New Year's Tag Lines

I had very simple dreams for 2003....they became tag lines really.

The first was: 'In Law Free In 2003' Which has turned out mainly true.

However, I also hoped to be 'Diaper Free In 2003'...sadly, unless my son tears off his diaper tomorrow and starts urinating in the forsaken potty...will not happen this year.

About a week ago, while drying The Boy off after bathtime, I started to give the 'Potty Pep Talk'. It goes a little something like this:

'Hey! Wow! You are getting so very very big!!! What a big boy you are! Huh...you know what some Big Boys do? They go pee pee in the potty! I know! It's totally crazy, but when they feel like they have to go pee pee...instead of going in their diaper, they go in the potty!' [Pause, to let this sink in] 'You know....I was thinking...you're a big boy right? Would you ever think about going pee pee in the potty instead of your diaper?'

As you can see this conversation involves more exclamation points than I typically use in an entire month...but I was still hoping for my New Year's tag line to come true.

Anyway...so I give him the 'talk' and he's naked and he's looking at me while I talk and then all the sudden I feel something wet and warm on my legs and I realize that while I'm giving the 'Potty Pep Talk' my son is urinating on my LEGS!

As in, 'Huh...what ass hole pees in a potty you idiot? I think I'm just going to pee where I please. My urine can not be contained in a simple plastic potty....I will pee on your legs lady. Get me a God Damn Diaper!!!'

Only, it was actually like he wasn't thinking a damn thing. Instead he was listening intently to my 'Potty Pep Talk' and didn't even notice urine was traveling from his penis to my legs.

I know, because I looked at his face for some sign of recognition that he was urinating on his mother...and there was no sign.

So my updated New Year's Tag Line is: 'Diapers No More In 2004'

God Help Me if he can't pull that off.

I have a few more tag lines for the coming year but I'll have to get to that later....I have far more pressing things to tend to.

Comments

[Deborah]

I am going to steal your "Diaper No more in 2004" tag line..its a good one. I have also been having potty pep talks with lots of exclamations. I tell my son: "All the big kids are doing it, its the latest craze! Peeing in the potty is a lot of fun!"