Fight Playdate.

While pregnant with Madison I spent many hours looking over the patterns at the fabric store dreaming of the costumes I might make for my soon to be born child. I have this thing for costumes, and my 'thing' doesn't include going to the stupid party supply store and spending an exorbitant amount of money on a piece of shit costume that cost about 25 cents to make. In Taiwan. In a sweatshop by children who will never wear a piece of shit costume to go trick or treating.

I feel like Sally Struthers right now, only less raspy.

I thought I'd have at least the first 10 years of her life and 10 years of Max's to control what they'd be for halloween.

The high water mark was 2001 when I had a chicken and an egg. But then, Maddie wanted to be a princess. How thoroughly Disney of her. And every year since she's been a boring princess.

I'd like to do something fun again, but the children have sucked every last bit of creativity out of my soul. I'm forever doomed to have a stupid party store dinosaur. Damn you Party City!

(Funny thing about his costume that almost makes it okay: Doesn't it look like the dinosaur has swallowed him and only his head remains in the dinosaur's mouth waiting to be devoured? I keep saying, "Max! Look out! That dinosaur is eating your head!!!!" But he doesn't get it. These are the jokes people!)

This weekend, Logan experienced one of those moments where, as a parent, you think...'I never knew I'd be this guy....walking around on a regular autumn day with a dinosaur.' But there he was strolling through the market....with a dinosaur.

The best advice I ever got about parenting was this: "Never say never because you never know."

You never know when you'll decide that it's just not worth fighting about the stupid Party Store dinosaur costume your sons been wearing for 12 hours a day for the last 4 days. Five years ago I never thought I'd be eating dinner at a restaurant with my son dressed head to toe in green polyester, but here I am and I lived to tell.

Max is having his girlfriend over tomorrow. Her name is Zoe. She's his girlfriend because she's a girl and a friend. She's also his girlfriend because they both like to color their faces with yellow chalk (note the yellow tinge to the photo.) He's been touting this playdate as the "Fight Playdate".

I'm not entirely clear on why it's called the Fight Playdate, except that they've both agreed to wear their halloween costumes to the 'Fight Playdate'. Between you and me, her Pokemon is totally kicking his Dinosaur ass.

Comments

[Jenn]

Too bad humor is totally wasted on kids sometimes. Someday he'll see that picture and totally laugh his ass off.

[L]

Your chick costume is so much better than the ones Martha is selling right now. Why didn't she bring you on to consult? The legs on her costumes look like someone wrapped children's limbs in Kraft Singles, which is all together a totally different halloween costume and just as good, but in a different, very calcium-aware way.

Why is #142 bleeding from the face and hands? Is that included with the bovine chaps?

And the best part about #13 is that now young mothers can coordinate their kid's costume with their college dorm comforters. "She's a kitty! And you can't see her when I prop her up against my pillow! God, it's just like when Rob and Mike tried to keep that kitten in a pizza box Junior year!"

[jill]

Need I remind you of Amos's famous football shoulder pads with the pillowcase cape? I would much rather walk around with a Dinosaur eating my childs head instead of having to explain this getup to everyone that walks by with the look of horror on there face...in AUGUST so, I can't blame it on Halloween.

Enjoy it Mom and take lots of pictures to torture him when his is older.

[MetroDad]

The first rule of Fight Playdate is that you don't talk about Fight Playdate!

[sarcastic journalist]

We went to IKEA and saw Super Man riding around in a basket. You're not alone.

[Mir]

You? Are Cool Mom. I? Am Mean Mom. I keep the costumes under lock and key because I am such a control freak that taking a dinosaur to the supermarket would cause me to bleed from the eyes. (Not that it bothers me to see other people's kids doing it, in the slightest. Seriously. I need more medication.)

I also made the joke about the kid being eaten by the costumer (dragon, in our case). The response? "Mama, don't be crazy." It was when I suggested that I had no control over my craziness that they started to look a little frightened....

[emily]

Seth has been wearing his Captain Hook costume...with the glasses from Randy's geek costume.Quite the combination.

[Ninotchka]

OMG I LOVE the chicken and the egg idea. SO cute. Yes, as they get older it is harder and harder to be creative with the costumes. I didn't even try with my second daughter. Her costumes have been store bought all the way. In my defense we did dress her as "Boo" from Monsters, Inc. after she wore her outrageously expensive witch costume in the Halloween portraits and never again. We changed our minds at the last minute.

[Lisa]

Melissa what are you worried about?? You know you will get at least 1/2 your money back next year when you sell it on Ebay!!! The ONLY thing I was thinking about when I forked out big money (to ME!) for Nick & Lexi's costumes this year!! LOL

[Michelle]

Ha! Amen on that "never say never" philosophy. I've lived long enough to taste the bitterness of my own oh-so-certain proclamations of youth coming back to haunt me. Come to think of it, they're still being returned to sender! Love the dino costume. My boy will only grudgingly wear his costume in exchange for a notarized guarantee of candy. Maybe this has something to do with the fact that I bought him a chicken suit this year that makes me laugh uncontrollably whenever it's on his person...

[patti]

Sofia wanted to be a train this year (a train?!? yes, a train), and just when I finally got it straight in my head how I was going to pull that one off, she decided to become a bunny. Relief washed over me because, I, unlike you, am no Martha, yet, at the same time, I was disappointed I wasn't going to get the opportunity to be domestically brilliant.

And yes, she has worn her bunny costume 24/7 -- even at the store, gasp! -- so that when Halloween finally does roll around, she'll most likely throw a huge, "I SAID I WANTED TO BE A TRAIN!!!" trantrum.

Max is an adorable dinosaur, store bought or not.

[kalisah]

With us it was Firefighter. When My Kid was 2-4, he wouldn't leave the house without his yellow rain slicker, fire hat, and plastic hose/ax/oxygen mask, even in 100 degree weather.

I miss those days.

[karen]

I should consider myself lucky that our current clothing issue involves those pants where the legs zip-off to turn into shorts. My 5 yr. old Cass likes to go out with one leg on and yes...one leg zipped off. I like this best when we cut through the really fancy stores.

[aussiemama]

I think the fight date is a concept we should carry on to the children's teenage years..that should sort out my 14 year old.

[jilbur]

pissed at LOD for beating me to it with his comment ...

[Shelley]

I abandoned my prejudice against store-bought costumes the year I spent four weeks making a starfish costume (I found the pattern in Family Fun). I searched all over town for the huge sheet of foam necessary, burnt the heck out of my fingers with the glue gun, and got yellow spray paint on my favourite shirt. On Halloween, my DD said - you guessed it - "I've changed my mind. Can't I just be a ghost?"

[e]

and the halloween quote of the year at our house is......"but Mom it looks like I am in a COSTUME, I wanted to look like a REAL Black Rider (big scary 8' tall dude fr LOTR) says my cute tiny 7 yr old daughter. arghhhhh, that is because it IS a costume. sigh. and yes my children feel deprived because don't like buying costumes, I prefer making them. I am THE MEANEST MOM in the WHOLE WORLD.

[Paula]

need suggestions, pictures, where to buy patters -- making 4 costumes -- dolphin, starfish, octopus and crab

Any info greatly appreciated