Gossip Geyser

I ask you Internet, with all the power of Al Gore, please send all of your positive energy, karma if you will, to my husband.

On to bitchier things!

Remember last week when the MOMS Club thing came up?

Well there are all these bitchy things I want to say about that situation but will it be interesting to read? Or will I just reveal myself to be as annoying and catty as those tongue wagging gossips?

Well yes, and I think I'm okay with that. For tonight. (For ever...but I won't always expect you to listen to it.)

Like I said before, in any group of people there are always bad apples. There are also lots of great people and usually you just kind of ignore the bad apples to enjoy the good people.

Sometimes though you put a group of mothers together in an organization founded on the principle that being a stay at home mother is the best way to raise kids, you may run into more than your fair share of jackassery.

Also, I am totally intolerant of gossips and most annoying people.

Sometimes being a stay at home mother can be a little boring and I guess what some stay at home mothers do when they're bored is talk about everyone else in the group in a bitchy manner.

I've alluded to one other incident of jackassery with the 'Breast is Best....Also Diet Coke!' lady, but there were other moments of jackassery, mostly when our group was made up of two cities.

Like this overzealous woman who made it her job to personally supervise every action, every email I sent, every event I organized.....sending me emails every other minute in a very control freakish kind of way to make sure I was doing things the way she thought best.

I call that time the 'FYI Era' because during that time I had one million emails from that woman which started with the phrases: "FYI" or "Did you realize...." or "My God I'm a busy body who has nothing better to do but go over everything you do with a fine tooth comb."

But then my favorite was the woman who had a constant stream of gossip spouting out of her face. A fountain of gossip and no one was free of her cattiness. Her best friend, the mailman, the women in our group she couldn't stand for whatever reason. Any time I saw her I did a mental countdown to see when she'd start spouting. A Gossip Geyser. She never disappointed.

I thought I'd left the 'FYI Era' behind and the 'Gossip Geyser' behind because Royal Oak got it's own group and the 'Gossip Geyser' and the 'FYI Emailer' were left behind to wag their tongues at each other in their very own MOMS club.

But oh no, she's still with me!

After I got the polite request to remove the name MOMS Club from my website at the request of a 'coordinator' I contacted the International MOMS Club about the issue. The regional coordinator had never heard of the issue....so I began to wonder who on earth told my chapter's president to ask me to remove the MOMS Club name from my website.

When the regional coordinator got back to me she revealed that it was SURPRISE! The Gossip Geyser who politely requested I remove the MOMS Club name from my website.

And surprise! The regional coordinator told me that she should never have made that request since this is a personal website. The Gossip Geyser retired her coordinator position. Over this? I'm unsure but now that I know she's reading I'm just tickled to have this forum to vent my intense annoyance with this annoying woman.

Why is she reading this site and why does she care if I mention MOMS Club? And if she cares so much about me mentioning the MOMS Club....why didn't she say something to me herself?

Answer: she's the Gossiping Geyser and she doesn't have time. She simply creates messes and then walks away.

And in the words of my robotic spouse, "Gah...just let it go."

And, though that's annoying as hell to hear him say, I have to agree. I need to just let it go....but the whole thing gives me such a pleasurable mix of irritation and glee and well the truth is....I've become one of those women with nothing better to do but wag my tongue about these annoying women.

That's why you must send up all your positive energy to whatever cosmos is involved in getting me a job and getting me the hell out of this house. Also I gave my official membership resignation last week because this is the kind of stupid thing I just can't participate in anymore.

Comments

[Antonia]

Good on ya. Ever consider joining the PTA?

[Jenn]

The thought of joining up with a MOMS Club or anything like it, should my husband and I ever decide to have kids, just scares the hell out of me. The cattiness, the nosiness, the "my-way-is-better-than-yours" crap...

And why is the spousal response always "Let it go?" That's pretty much my husband's standard response.

By the way, I LOVE your new banner. Reasonably merry and bright is about all I can drum up for myself at the moment.

[Amy]

I do belong to a national moms' support group (not MOMS Club :) and it actually sort of saved my life at one point. I was pretty depressed and lonely when I had my first child and I joined the group when pregnant with my second, wanting to break the cycle of loneliness. I found a lot of moms who were parented like I did or who were willing to talk about the good, bad and the ugly in honest terms. I made some close friends for the first time in years. HOWEVER, we do spend an awful lot of time gossiping and the group is pretty divided. It gets tiring. I think moms' groups do provide an important support service that can be really beneficial, especially if you're a "transplant" like me, living far from family and lifelong friends. But it can't be your whole reason for living. You have to have other things going on in your life besides just "who did what to whom" within the group. (And I have to admit that, until I became co-leader of the group and suddenly had to deal with all kinds of petty crap, I might have been a little tiny bit like that FYI woman. I may have actually used FYI a few times in my messages. But being on the other side and seeing how incredibly irritating it is to field those kinds of messages, I've learned to let a lot of things go. No more FYI messages from me.)

[MetroDad]

"The first rule of MOMS Club is - you do not talk about MOMS Club. The second rule of MOMS Club is - you DO NOT talk about MOMS Club. Third rule of MOMS Club, someone yells "Stop!", goes limp, taps out, the fight is over. Fourth rule, only two moms to a fight. Fifth rule, one fight at a time, mothers. Sixth rule, no shirt, no shoes. Seventh rule, fights will go on as long as they have to. And the eighth and final rule, if this is your first time at MOMS Club, you have to fight."

[Jo]

Ooo... how delicious that the scary gossipy woman is reading! ;-)

I hereby dare 'Gossiping Geyser' to delurk herself and the explain gossipy actions re: your blog! Go on Geyser - I bet you haven't got the guts!!

(I know I know - petty.... but I can't help it! Someone must fight the dark force that is Moms Club scariness for the benefit of all womankind.....Go Melissa Go!!)

[Lisa]

I was in a Mom's Club- though not the official Mom's Club- as a matter of fact when they came to town (after our organizaion had been going 12 years) they made us change our name. We had never heard of them. We started our little group with 20 moms in a park. This was before Al Gore invented the internet. (Okay okay I know he didn't say that, but isn't it fun to repeat?) Anyway they came in here 2 or 3 years ago with a lawyer and all and threatened to sue. Our entire assests were some Halloween directions and play dough, so if I had still been in charge I would have said bring em on. However the current ladies relented and became Mom's Network or something.
At one time when I was president we had like 100 members. It was fun, I met my best friend and for God sake's gave me adults to talk to. There were some women I couldn't stand, but I liked most of them. I just outgrew after awhile. How many times can you listen to the new mom's birth story? I moved up the mom food chain to how the hell do you get your kid into a good school, now I am edging close to where the hell do you send your kid to college? Oops, I have to first go through who has the best prices on a chastity belt, Target or Shopko?

[Mir]

I see so much of me in your, or is it you in me, that it both frightens and delights me....

Hey, Gossip Geyser! BUSTED!

[tracy]

LOL at MetroDad. And at the fact that Gossiping Geyser is reading this (and seriously, woman, you need to get a freaking LIFE!)

[Corrie]

I always kind of (kind of being the key word) wanted to be in a MOMS Club, because I thought it might be cool and I so want to be a "cool" mom. However, after reading this whole ordeal, I won't. I'm 28, I don't need elemntary school drama. Thank You!

[Kasmira]

Thanks for posting the link to your old blog. I did not know it still existed! You will now keep me entertained for many more "working" hours!

[Lauren]

Melissa,

Just a couple of things: I'm greatly saddened by your resignation from the MOMS Club. Because, in case you didn't realize it, now I can't share your sharp invective with MY mothers' club. Just FYI.

[JohnC]

I had to recently stop the flood of email coming from the "parents" list I belong to. It was so exhausting keeping up with the trauma, the "need" for support. The complete lack of reason. Someone was bitching about the teacher of their autistic child. I pointed out that she needed to remain patient, and that the teacher was doing the best she could. *POW*. You would have thought that instead of an appeal to patience, I had suggested that Hitler had some good ideas. I think it is the group mentality that makes me nuts. I did not want to quit the group. Fortunately it is just a Yahoo! group, so I can stop getting the email.
I have not read your Blog in a while Liss, you are really hitting your stride!

[cooper]

I no longer do the Moms Gorup thing, as it got truly depressing after a while for all the delightful reasons you point out. Now I am on to school COMMITTEES. If you think the MOMS group is frightening, try a group of competitive, professional mothers with lots and lots of need (not to mention time and energy) to prove they are so much better than each other. Oh my god, it is just too horrible to bear. Last year I watched a COMMITTEE almost bring a grown man to tears as they taste-tested the meal he was proposing to serve at the annual school benefit. As the moms one upped each other over their knowledge of gourmet cooking, they tore the poor caterer to bits. My husband and I decided it would be a PERFECT scene in a movie.

[flea]

((((((((((Melissa)))))))))))))

[Kim Voynar]

Holy Geez. Yeah, I did the mom's club thing for several years after becoming a SAHM. On the one hand, it saved my life and sanity, I met some nice people who brought meals to my family when I was on bedrest with my last pregnancy and with the two births before that one.

OTOH, there was SO much gossiping and backstabbing and the "my parenting is better than your parenting" that I finally had to leave. Why is it that a group of grown women cannot get together without that happening? Do men have that problem too? Ugh. Then I got sucked into the PTSA thing and THAT? Was even worse. Yeah, it sucks. It's hard finding friends when you're a grownup. I like being around my kids much better than I like being around most other grownups. Sad.

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