Mamapalooza

I know you're looking for something to do on Sunday night. This is what you should do.

I am trying to do this, but my sister won't come with me because she hates me. Never mind that she babysat last weekend so I could go to a baby shower for my cute friends. The shower was at Buca Di Beppo and we sat at the pope table and already, the old pope was gone. Replaced with the new pope. Who is creepy when staring at you at a baby shower, I must tell you. I'm sorry. Part of the problem is that the old Pope filled the entire plexiglass box on the table and the new pope fills about 1/4th the space. He looks beady.

My sister hates me because to her, spending a night listening to moms who rock feels like death. I'm determined to make her come with me, even if it means I have to buy her a lace camisole at Bra~vo Intimates in Royal Oak. Also I'll find out if my boobs have shrunk from a C to a B. Which I think they have and I think that makes me feel like punching someone.

Today someone emailed me (Hi Jill!) and said she could never have a blog because she can't string together two thoughts in a cohesive way. I thought to myself, 'Neither can I."

At the end of this incohesive post I'd like to add that if you live in Royal Oak, you should listen to the Candy Band and vote in the school board election May 3rd for the correct candidate preferably.

I love Royal Oak and I'd sort of like to see more families move in and enjoy downtown and the library and the Brewery. The biggest thing missing from Royal Oak is families. Electing school board members who would like to see our neighborhood schools succeed is one of the best ways you can save our city from the young, single, childless, hipsters (not to mention the older, retired, fixed income, older people).

I simplify because I'm drunk.

Also, I really miss Logan and from now until monday that's all I'm going to talk about. Phallic symbols which make me think of my hot husband who's not here.

Like this one from the school we both attended.

I just have to make it until Monday. Just Monday.

Comments

[LisaV]

That is a really big, er, building. Yeah, that's the ticket, building. Girl you are horny. Logan is a lucky man that you like such big buildings.

[buffi]

That picture is a riot! I just pray for Logan's sake, he doesn't have jet lag Monday. Do robots get jet lag??

You know, after nursing 3 babies (not at once), I have gone down to an A cup. That is just sooo wrong. Damn kids.

[Flippy]

Oh, you're just trying to phallic away the in-laws, aren't you?

[Calliope]

ACK! It's the Big Dick! Run for your lives!

Ah, Ypsilanti. I used to date a guy in Ypsi when I was going to U Mich. I met him while I was working at Zingermanns. That was after I had worked at Cottage Inn Pizza, Mongolian BBQ, The One-Eyed Moose, some coney island place and before I worked at the Gandy Dancer. God, I could not keep a job in that town.

[Jen in MD]

The "big dick"!!!! My best friend went to Eastern. Just that pic brought back a flood of memories, makes me miss Michigan! Take care.

[Heatheranne]

Always wanting to be one to help, I thought I'd share this with you. A few months ago I got a new camera. I became obsessed with taking pictures of water drops (it sounds stupid, but it really is cool!). After snapping a ton of pictures, I downloaded them on the computer to see them. I saw the coolest water drop picture and posted it on my photo blog. So, here it is...My phallic water drop photo. I hope this helps with your search for phallic until Logan comes back home.

http://www.heather-anne.com/photo/archives/2005/03/hmmm.html#000245

[Lisa Precht]

Poor Logan, that's all I got'ta say...hope you have a babysitter for Monday night...

[Jez]

Melissa - just emailed you a priceless pic that may take you out for days.....enjoy!

[clickmom]

Babes- I am so jealous, after marathon nursing my 3 kids for over a decade, yes-I am quite hardcore in the area, I actually have BIGGER and LONGER and less attractive PENDULOUS breasts. In my dreams they shrink up and I can do things like run without clutching them, roll over in bed without rearranging them, and even cross my arms!

As a matter of fact, I think I'll do an essay on them for my own blog. Hopefully I won't get too many porno seeking hits from it.

[kristine]

and it's times like this I am reminded why I keep coming back here.

[Jennifer]

You are cracking my ass up with these pictures. I bet your out-laws are digging their own graves right now just so they can jump in them and roll around in self-righteous mortification. :-)

[Janis]

ohhhh!! Buca Ddi Beppo! I'm jealous! Not only do they have wonderful food they also make the best damn Mojito's I have ever had.

If you haven't had them before, next time you go, have a couple. So very delish!

[Sarcastic Journalist]

I've been doing this solo thing all day and woman, you are a saint. it isnt even 9pm and I'm drinking.

How do you do it?

[Flippy]

Someone's mailbox is full. Perchance could it be because of extremely large pictures of, uh, buildings?

[jenB]

yes, i just tried to send you a photo and you are all full up! :-)

[MonoCerdo]

The first time I visited my boyfriend at Eastern, he had mentioned in his directions to me that I'd drive by a water tower that looked like a "big dick." And that's what I wrote down: "Pass water tower that looks like big dick." Somehow I got lost, and when I stopped at a gas station to ask for help, the women there asked to see my directions so as to point me on my way. I handed them over without really thinking about it, and after a few seconds they both started laughing uncontrollably, at which point I realized what they were reading and turned bright red.

[Saple]

Ypsilanti!!!!!!!! Love It.... Oh the memories I miss the Tower Inn Pizza.

[Lil' Sis]

I craftily avoided the internet all weekend to prevent guilt over not going to see Mom Rock (which is nowhere NEAR as good as Cop Rock, which I would go see in a heartbeat.) because, even though I have that amazing niece and adorable nephew, I still see parenting as a disease that it takes at least 18 years to recover from. And somehow I still fear it may be contagious. I'm sorry. It's just not worth the risk. I will still take the camisole, tho.

Miao.

[Marie]

Ypsi-fuckin-lanti. How did I miss this post???

[Stephanie]

Just saw the Mamapalooza story by Bill Geist on the CBS Sunday Morning News show today...I felt like "hey, I know this place called Royal Oak, or at least someone who lives in it". I live in Kansas City and truly enjoy reading your blog. Keep 'em coming!...