Please, just hack up the lung and get it over with.

Someone suggested Logan would be a nice husband if he were to give me a gift certificate to purchase the camera of my hot and dirty dreams.

He would love to give me that lovely piece of equipment, but he can't. At one time he believed a money tree flourished in the basement. At one time, I believed there was a money orchard out in the country somewhere and Logan was secretly harvesting it and not telling me. But we've both been slapped across the face with financial reality so it's not that he could give me the camera but won't. It's that we don't have theextra money to spend on a frivilous piece of camera equipment. Actually we do have the extra money, but if we buy the camera we won't have the extra money. I like having a little extra money when all the bills are paid so I'm not buying the camera. No matter how strongly my old wicked ways try to convince me it's a good idea.

I've mentioned before how my mind has shifted. At this point, I do not want to part with my money. It physically pains me to give away the money which makes me feel comfortable and stable in this life. I hate being poor more than I hate not having the camera.

HOWEVER!

Tonight we sat down and looked at Logan's frequent flier miles and I am flying to San Antonio on Wednesday night! Like Wednesday....tomorrow night!

This means I'll be sleeping in a large bed in a private guest house all alone.

This means I'll be sitting by the pool reading endless People magazines while soaking up sun (GOD HELP ME THERE WILL BE SUN)

Let's pretend I won't have to put on a bathing suit (and no, naked would not be better so don't even) to do any of this. Oh God the bathing suit.

But let's not dwell on that.

When Logan goes out of town I like to think he's having one non stop party. And sometimes, it is a party. Like when he went to this place and then moved onto other places late in the night. Places where people may or may not be wearing clothing.

He called me from the airport Sunday while waiting to board the plane and his ears were hurting and his body was aching and he said, "There's just so little down time on these trips."

And I said, "Define 'down time'."

Because I like sleep, especially when I'm sick and you wouldn't find me at a bar where the employees may or may not be wearing clothing at 4 o'clock in the morning. You would find me snuggled up in the king sized bed I had in my room because that would be down time and that would be more important to me.

I'm leaving town for an extended weekend, and I know it's not the same as when Logan goes away because when he goes to Arizona for a photo shoot there are beautiful models and R.V.'s and semi trucks carrying vehicles for the shoot and six trucks carrying models and the crew and equipment. He has an entourage. When Logan goes on a trip there are police blocking roadways and cars driving the wrong way on a one way street all because he, The Art Director, COMMANDS it!

My trip will be lower key and won't actually be expanding my career or paying me. But that's what makes it so great that Logan gave me his miles so I could get out of this house and regroup a little bit.

He can't buy me the camera but he is getting me out of the house and into the sunshine and warmth and I love him for that.

I love him even though he's grouchy as hell from coughing all night long and feeling like garbage. He went to the doctor this morning and got a steroid shot, an inhaler and antibiotics for an ear infection. I've been sick since March 18th. When the hell did I become a martyr? Why haven't I gone to the doctor?

So when I heard they didn't just tell him it was a virus and to 'wait it out', I hung up on him and called to get an appointment. There better be drugs for me. I've been suffering way longer.

I think I may have cursed myself when I told Laura Berman I didn't want to be an insipid mommy blogger, giving a blow by blow daily report of what I'm doing.

Uhm. I also just ate a cheese sandwich.

Comments

[sarah]

After having a terrible morning and feeling just a bit sick myself (March 18!--get to the doctor. ouch), the thought of flying away somewhere warm, all myself. Wow. Have a terrific time. The internet will be jealous.

[Ken]

Mmm, cheese sandwich.

I'm glad that you'll be able to get away. But does that mean you won't be there when I come visit? :'(

[Toryssa]

I am far more jealous of a weekend in Texas (and I don't even like Texas) than I would be of the camera (not that the camera isn't damn cool). When the majority of my time is spent with someone that finds Dora and PB&J's the most exciting things, ever, alone time is priceless.

Enjoy!

[Sarcastic Journalist]

#1- isn't laura berman that sex doctor that is on the Oxygen network?

#2-- SAN ANTONIO? Man, man. So close, yet so far!!!!

have fun!

[Stacy]

Mmmmm... methinks the gift of time is far better than a camera, any day.

Yeah, "downtime" for me is sleeping. Reading. Uninterrupted. Sun. Quiet.

Sounds blissful... enjoy!

[yvonne]

My best friend lives in San Antonio, so I'm suddenly filled with jealousy, which is stupid because it's not like you're going to visit HER, but still...

[Greg]

What kind of bread?? What kind of cheese?? You always keep the personal details to yourself!!

[Ninotchka]

Enjoy your trip!!! I'd settle for a lousy day at a local spa. An entire weekend sounds really good right now. (I'm sick too)

[Sarah]

Have a great time! Here in Ann Arbor, it was sleeting this morning. Can I be your carry-on?

[karyn]

Have a GREAT trip!! I recently had an extended weekend to regroup at my friends house in the mountains. I found that if you read too many of the People-type magazines at once, you get really stressed out over the lives of celebrities. Just saying...take them slowly!

[Cori]

~Are you going to the doctor before your trip?
~Do you realize how many mommy bloggers you have made insanely jealous by telling us that you get to pack up and leave for any length of time, much less an entire weekend???
~Mmm...cheese sandwich! I need to start eating breakfast.

[Angelposh]

God I'm so jealous. We had layoffs yesterday and I literally feel like I've been hit in the head. I neeed a sunny vacation.

~I just had a cup of really good coffee

[Em]

Awesome! Have the best time. Take photos of pillows and quiet!

[ella]

How long will you be in San Antonio?

I'm in Austin about 1 1/2 hours away. Hate to burst your bubble but it's been overcast. Doesn't meant the sun ain't shinin' in S. A. though.
But we don't have any snow either!

Have fun!

[Lil' Sis]

I will no longer feel any sympathy for you.
No, I'm lying. I still will feel a little.
But maybe some nice dry warm temperatures will help you get better. Let me know if you need some books to take.

-Miao.

[Heather]

Happy shorty vacation dear!
We all are in need of a weekend in San Antonio!
Enjoy, Enjoy, Enjoy!

[cursingmama]

Vacation! Without Children! Wow! I am uber jealous, have a wonderful time!

[Amy]

I get all tingly just thinking about your trip. Have a great time!

[FeelinGroovy]

are you taking the laptop or do we all have to suffer in silence until you return????

[e]

Enjoy San Antonio! If you've never been, the Menger Hotel has amazing coffee and breakfasts. http://www.historicmenger.com/

[Steve]

You need to have a nice big hot cup of chicken soup, a big cool gulp of Nyquil (possibly to the kids too), and look at this web site which I swear was written by you - or someone who might just be your twin sister - cruelly separated at birth - but who by incredible good fortune and my thoughtfulness is reconciled to you and you'll problably love her so much you'll take her with you on vacation when you go (leaving Logan to look after the kids and cough all over the house). Or not.

... http://www.threadbared.com/

and have a lovely time

[Taamar]

You can have my camera if I can have your vacation! I'll even wear a bathing suit over my chunky, pasty white heiny!

[Maia]

Lovely, lovely.. Just what you need.

[MollieBee]

Yay!!!

Have fun and be warm!

[Darlene]

Have a great time and just do for you!!! That was so sweet of Logan! even if his hacking up a lung does annoy the hell out of you, give him a big hug and then leave him with the kids!!! Get meds!! March 18th is too long!

[Jez]

sleep 'til the sun bakes your eyelids together.

.....i am so jealous.

[mamaloo]

I have to know! Why San Antonio?

[Phil]

Some people might want to know the details of (a) why San Antonio and (b) what else will you do there and (c) how will you make sure that Max and Madison don't sneak into your checked baggage while you're not looking.

But when it comes to important questions, I'm with Greg.

[jenB]

i am happy as heck for you too!

but

why san antonio?
and will you be incommincado whilst gone?