Buy My Friend's House.

A huge storm blew through our neighborhood last night and wiped out a power line across the street. A few huge green blasts of light followed by some extremely unsettling zapping noises, which I assume were squirrels being fried off the wires, and then silence. But it wasn't done! Then there was flickering and bright yellow light in the trees and I started shrieking, "We're ALL GOING TO FRY!!!!!!!"

Logan slapped me and I calmed down and we didn't die. Instead, we had another cocktail and watched all the neighbors run down to watch the (extremely hot) firemen do their job. Their job which was to wrap yellow caution tape across the entrance to the court the wires were flapping around on.

We didn't lose our power, thank you Jesus. But our neighbors did and we felt a little bad about that so we turned off all our lights because isn't it rude to flash your electrical powers all over the place while others are suffering?

But that didn't stop us from sitting on the porch surfing the internet by candlelight.

After Logan's drunken night a week or so ago, I told him I would never again sleep on that mattress (for reasons I am not aloud to discuss with the internet). The floor isn't comfortable and the sofa bed= pain in the mother fucking ass. So I amended my ultimatum to be: "I will never again make the bed until we have a new (queen size) mattress."

And I haven't. Unfortunately, as you recently read, money is being dumped from our ship in an alarming and totally non sensical way. So the mattress is not coming anytime soon. However, not making the bed is seriously depressing. I realize lots of people don't make their bed but for me not making the bed is like not brushing my teeth everyday.

Also? Do you need a house?

Do you need a house in Sterling Heights, Michigan?

Because I have the perfect house for you at a bargain price! The good things about this house are: Mostly just the fact that Mike, our friend, is one of the most anally retentive men I've ever known. Which means, he takes extremely good care of the things he owns.

Mike actually has a preference for his mower. He bought a honda but then decided the toro was way better. Logan and I had a mower which was compiled of 3 different mowers. Don't buy our house. Buy Mike's. Oh and look at those pictures in the listing, see the one of the workshop? See how everything is pristine and all hung neatly on peg racks? The organization, it makes me tingle.

Also it has all those 'real estate things' like a nice lot, it's on a quiet cul de sac, with a nice deck and a nice layout. Bathrooms and first floor laundry! It's in move in condition, which is something I've never seen for that price out here. But there it is, waiting for you!

Comments

[allison]

I never used to be this way until I moved in w/ my boyfriend (now husband), but the bed HAS.TO.BE.MADE. He started doing it every day, and now when he misses a day; I get sad. :-( and then I have to do it myself. But I feel accomplished at least if the friggin' bed is made... weird.

[Stacy]

Live a little... go on up to the king-size mattress.

And for those of us who missed it, can you do a coded entry about what happened? Then we can all get decoder rings and figure it out. That would be cool.

[styro]

Once upon a time, a hurricane named Isabel came rollicking through my city and left me without power for 12 days. **Twelve** days. My roommate and I went to the movies to sit in the air conditioning!! and be entertained by those fancy moving pictures!! and to drink a cold soda with ICE! ACTUAL ICE!!! I cried the day the power came back on: I sat down on the floor and WEPT (while flicking everything in the house on and off and on again like an amish kid let loose in the city).

It humbled me greatly. It was nice of you to shut off your lights and fake like you were powerless, too. I'm sure your neighbors appreciated your sacrifice.

[Kismet]

I am sorry your floor is hard :)
Make one of the kids sleep with Logan and you can have their bed!

~K!

[Marie]

That storm hit pretty quickly and pretty hard.. however I couldn't hear the squirrels screaming on my block because my cat was yowling under my bed so loudly that I could barely hear myself think. I was pretty sure that we would see some tornado action because of the fast temp drop, though.

[elisabeth]

not knowing the drunken night story is killing me. I'll give you a beer (or 3) if you tell it to me. Love the new shoes, btw.

[Ninotchka]

I HAVE to make my bed. It's something my Mom brainwashed me to do. But seriously, if I don't make my bed, my whole house seems "off." Like bad chi or something. Conversely, the whole house could be messy as shit but if the bed is made, I'm (somewhat) OK with it.

You're not alone. Perhaps we should start a support group? ha!

Cute house, by the way. Good luck to your friend!

[mango]

How about, I will never make something else until we have a new mattress? (Remember Lysistrata?)

Also, if you don't mind, Melissa, there was something I was dying to ask on the last thread, but didn't dare, and it came up again here per your mattress issue.

All your posters' ways to stop money from disappearing were fascinating to read, and good ideas. Believe me, I sympathize with you -- my money disappears too! But there's one thing I couldn't figure out, and I was surprised that nobody addressed it. Emergencies.

Since everybody knows that household appliances are best friends, and inseparable, what do you do when not one, not two, but THREE of them break down irreversibly (ie bite the dust) within a few months? Even if you have a safety fund, that could pay for one or two, but not three. And not the blown out tire, either.

IOW, all these ideas sound great, but where is the contingency plan? (I'm hoping to learn something here!) For broken fridges, washing machines and dryers, all within six months, in my case, and a new mattress in yours. Personally. I had to get a bank loan for the third appliance, and that is SO against my religion, but we had no choice.

Melissa, I railroaded SO into getting a new mattress by promising to make it worth his while, lol. FWIW. But all the appliances were humming along happily then.

[mango]

Another thing -- you SO did the right thing by turning your lights off. We were young and foolish, alas, when we had the storm of the century here Xmas 1999. We had electricity, our next door neighbors didn't, so we ended up with the four of them living here for a week. I'll take candles, anytime! Or even a root canal!

[Pam]

I'm a compulsive bed-maker as well, but not the reason I want to post a comment.

After checking out Mike's house, I have to ask, what of spirits are going to be left behind by someone who has a purple couch with yellow chairs?

[clickmom]

I have to agree regarding the king size bed. We suffered, er..snuggled in a queen for years, and finally got a king when we moved to the burbs and had a bedroom large enough. I always say there is only one down side to king size bed, and that is that sometimes when they are snoring and you reach out to punch them, you miss.

I always make my bed, but it has nothing to do with being neat or god forbid good house keeping. It is my distaste for dog fur that keeps my sheets covered all day long. (I am not even going to mention what she might-could possibly drag onto the bed to chew too, Eewww)

[clickmom]

I have to agree regarding the king size bed. We suffered, er..snuggled in a queen for years, and finally got a king when we moved to the burbs and had a bedroom large enough. I always say there is only one down side to king size bed, and that is that sometimes when they are snoring and you reach out to punch them, you miss.

I always make my bed, but it has nothing to do with being neat or god forbid good house keeping. It is my distaste for dog fur that keeps my sheets covered all day long. (I am not even going to mention what she might-could possibly drag onto the bed to chew too, Eewww)

[Lil' Sis]

Man! The storm just totally blew over Hamsandwich. We got maybe 30 minutes of rain & some pretty lightening, but nothing serious enough that I felt like I couldn't go outside in. My office, on the other hand, lost power over night and the air conditioning is still not cooling it all down at 7:30pm. Why did DTE have to be so damn efficient & get my office power back?! I coulda had a day off.
-Miao.

[Lin]

I am SO ready to move my pregnant daughter, granddaughter and son-in-law out of their charming Spanish-style apartment that is in an edgy (don't you just love that word)part of L.A. right off La Brea Ave. to Mike's house. Okay, they live in L.A. and that's a drawback, but they cannot find a two bedroom house in an area where the public schools are just ADEQUATE, not GREAT, for under $750,000.00.

[patti]

So do you get a commission? Cuz you should. ;0)

[Annejelynn]

ahhh, surfing by candlelight

[Ann]

Isabel!! - someone beat me to it, but we were only without power for 9 days, not 11...and the most aggravating part was we could see the lights on at the grocery store one block away from our living room window.

My kids were 5 months and 4 at the time. That meant changing diapers with a snakelight wrapped around my neck and figuring out how to wash sheets "like great-grandma did" when the older one wet the bed.

That's a big reason why we moved to dry, hurricane free New Mexico.

Also, imagine this horror...my husband and I sleep in a full size bed...one we inherited from Aunt Freida.

[amy]

You mean other women have firemen fantasies or were you joking? I married one and have YET to have him wear the yellow fire suit, climb up to our bedroom to 'rescue me'. Sheesh, can't a woman have any fun? T'is true, even fire TRUCKS get me hot :)

Cut Logan off from the fun things that go ON in the unmade bed. He might just find the funds...

[Sarcastic Journalist]

For some reason, I had decided that everyone in other parts of the country lived in Craftsman style homes.

I feel very confused.

[Torrie]

Can I move the house to Manhattan? 'Cause if so, I'll take it!

Damn apartment.

[DM]

Mmm. Firemen.

Not only is my (queen) bed unmade but it is partially covered with clean clothes and maybe a book or two. But then I am single and alone and only take up one side. Which is even more depressing than the fact that my bed is unmade. Except that I don't really care if I make the bed or not. I am a slacker.

[MelissaS]

SJ: The east side is newer development. Around here there are lots of 20's craftsmen bungalows.

[Jill]

I love craftsman bungalows!! Alas, there aren't any to be found in this part of the country either.

I must say that I feel for you on this drunken night thing. As someone married to a person who has has his fair share of drunken binges, with lots of friends who do the same, I bet I could guess what happened to the mattress! But, like everyone else, I'll just be wondering & hoping you come out with the secret decoder message. :)

Jill

[kalisah]

A valuable piece of suburban etiquette: "turn off all your lights if the neighbors loose their electricity so as to not flash your electrical powers all over the place while others are suffering." Good to know.

[skg]

I love the fact that your friend chose to include a photo of his very organized "handy man" room versus say, the kitchen. It's cute in a clearly-a-man-lives-here kind of way. By the way, what is "Malibu Lighting"? Does this mean the lighting in the bathroom will give me the appearance of a Barbie tan or will I still look as pasty as I do in my own bathroom?

[max]

With furniture like that, Mike must be straight.
If he is gay somebody needs to take his card away.

My GOD that is tacky furniture.

Where exactly does one even find that kind of stuff?