This is what a dinner party will get you.

At Blogher I did this annoying thing in the hotel room I shared with Alice and Mrs Kennedy (I am, frankly, too drunk and too tired to link). The annoying thing went like this:

"Oh my God....I love you guys! Oh God! You Guys! I love you! No stop me from talking you guys.....Stop me!"

That's how I'm feeling right now. Because my friends were just here and I had a few drinks with them over dinner.

I want to tell you all about how much I love the internet and how much I love my group of girlfriends. My friends which are named Chrissy, Leslie, Andrea, Me, (and) Stephanie.

Yes! The CLAMS! Or CALMS if you want to be a smart ass.

I felt like I needed to put something up here because it's been a while but I have so much more to say about my friends. Things I would say if I hadn't had at least five beers in three hours. (you do the math).

Whenever we start to talk about our friendship, Logan or whichever husband is present, says, "Oh God, here we go....." Then they make wretching noises because we all married ass holes. Except Stephanie because her husband stares at us admiringly when we start talking about how much we love each other.

Imagine the most overwhelming internet love-fest and that's what you get when you get the CALMS, I mean, CLAMS together.

But right now I'm so fucking wasted.....remind me though: tomorrow we're being even more self exposing.

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Update the morning after: Wow. Just....wow.

Comments

[Lisa]

Funny! Are these the Republician CLAMS?
You should write more when you're drunk :)

[clickmom]

I totally know what you are saying. My group calls ourselves "Babes" but when we refer to our group in public we just say "My book group" so we don't sound too nauseatingly in love with each other. But man, I totaly love those girls!

[roo]

Hmmm.

Bearded clams, perhaps?
Or maybe beer-ed clams?

Either way, you're clam-tastic!

[kelly]

So you'll be posting nipple shots?

or CLAMS shots?

Or...or...or...

(You'd be fun to drink with, methinks.)

[Sarcomical]

god, i wish i had a group of girlfriends like that. all i have is my husband (which is good, but i mean really) and family OH and...oh wait, that's it.

can i come to your house and be an extra M? you know, "CLAMMS!"

*pfff*

[andreainjapan]

Friends are the best, they exist because they love you as you are. you can talk to them like you can not talk to yourself. No mother is sane with out her friends.
It is impossible to loose a true friend.

[sweetney]

ahh, the blogher 'i love yous'... good times, good times.

sniff.

[Stephanie]

Lisa, three of the five of us are actually democrats! Gasp! But we obviously all get along beautifully.

And Kelly, Melissa is a blast to drink with.

(Oh, by the way, I'm the "S" in CLAMS)

[paul]

Of course you all married assholes. We're guys, it's the only thing we know. Stephanie is simply the exception that proves the rule. George Carlin puts it this way. Men are stupid and women are crazy. The reason why women are so crazy is that men are so stupid.

[Jen]

Stephanie's husband isn't looking at you ladies admiringly ... he's probably fantasizing all of you in bed together.

[Lil' Sis]

See why I don't have a blog?
You don't even KNOW what I would have wrote about, just on lack of sleep, last night.
Tonight will be worse, I can guarantee it... I'll just say that Logan & Scott are TOTALLY going to get along with the new boyfriend.

Also, I was just reading the 10/24 issue of People, and there's an article about A Day in the Life of the American Woman. I will save it for you.

-miao.

[reenie]

If you kicked Leslie out and let me join we could be the CRAMS. And I was thinking the same thing Jen was thinking.

[MFA Mama]

LMAO...I read Alice's account of that and it was HILARIOUS! And roo, I was thinking the same thing but wasn't going to say it. Shame on you.

[reenie]

(no offense, Leslie!) I just needed that space. But - if you changed your name to Peslie, we could be the CRAMPS!

Gah...that was stupid, wasn't it?

[JuJuBee]

Wowsers, what did you girls DO last night ;)

[Rae]

Heh. Drunk or sober, you make me laugh, Melissa.

[Lauren]

I 3rd Jenn and Reenie. He was thinking of a threesome. You all know he was.

fucking assholes! all of them!

[HollyRhea]

I have a theory that people only become exaggerations of themselves when drunk*. If they have anger issues, the fight; if they have unhealed hearts, they cry. You obviously have a lot of love. (and I bet it's really funny to watch)

*unless you're drinking tequila. Tequila does strange stuff to everybody.

[Torrie]

That was awesome. You should post drunk more often, although next time I think you should take some drunk pictures.

[Jon]

It's refreshing to see a person living life to it's fullest. Good humor, a strong marriage (even if to an asshole), love and laughter, friends. You're blessed, Melissa.

[BK]

I feel bad for your kids. You drink too much and seem to think it is funny (as do the other here who are so eager to kiss your ass). Now, I don't know you, but from what I have read here over the last several months, it seems like you need some help. Growing up with an alcoholic mother was a living hell. I hope you're not putting your kids through that.

[MelissaS]

Oh BK, that's what psychologists call 'projection'. I appreciate your concern but assure you it's totally unnecessary.

I'm sorry about your childhood.