Going Forward

Before we all (read = before I) go crazy: The plumber said other things which will make us all feel better. (Guys, paypal was for last year, this year we can take on these things with a tiny bit of grace.)

The plumber told us that to bypass the broken spot underneath our addition, it would cost $6,000.00. After that we'd see if there were more broken spots in our pipes. At that point, it would cost $12,000. Oh sweet Jesus.

But he also said, "I don't know when the broken pipe will actually collapse. Could be tomorrow, could be 10 years from now."

He suggested we have the $80 drain snake each year. The problem is, if we want to sell this house we have to tell the new potential owners about this problem. Which, in essence, means we're never leaving this shit hole.

Remind me to tell you what exactly I don't like about living here.

Also Logan leaves for Portland, Oregon tomorrow. If you are in possession of Man Saving Panties I suggest you don them in preparation for his arrival.

May God be with you Panty Wearing Women Of Portland.

Comments

[kb4]

Huh! As a representative of the Panty Wearing Women of Portland, I respectfully decline.

[tikimama]

Hey, I live in Portland! Did we ever really get an explanation of what exactly Man Saving Panties are? Thongs? Edible?

[jenB]

maybe panties made out of fruit roll ups or something?

we snake our pipes (tee hee) every year to avoid the root thing. the lesbians that sold us the house never told or didn't know. hmpf.

[FlippyO]

Damn lesbians, always sneaky with their pipes.

[mamaloo]

hey! I'm in portland! what's the robot coming here for? have him go to Queen Bee and get you a messenger bag while he's here!

[Daugher In Law]

Disclosure's a bitch.

[floridamomm]

We own our own plumbing company and (aside from the DH coming out and giving you a real estimate) I would suggest you get a few more....for 6 to 12 thousand you could plumb three NEW houses Rough/trim/topout... Unbelievable!!!!

[ozma]

$12,000? That's just wrong. And terrifying to read about.

TWELVE THOUSAND DOLLARS? Did you get a second opinion?

I'm going to go pray to the Virgin of Guadelupe now to fix your toilet. Seriously! Or at least to make your pipes cheaper to fix.

[wookie]

I don't believe you are required to tell a potential buyer much of anything. If it won't show up in the home inspection, you could be gold (the rules I am familiar with are Ontario rules, so the evil, evil Canada)

Oh sure, it's morally ambiguous, but do you wanna leave or do you wanna be perfect? Do you want to spend 6 grand on a place that you're leaving?

[Melissa Summers]

You are legally required to disclose all known issues with the house. I would be legally responsible if I didn't tell potential buyers about this issue.

Though, I think, since most houses around here have the roots in the pipe issue it may not be as devastating as I think.

[veg4me]

Age of shingles and other roof components, leaks in the roof or foundation walls,existing mold or mildew within the home, damage from wood destroying insects,problems with sewer or septic systems,the amount of property taxes paid per year, the square footage of the home, and if the home is in an airport's flight path.

That's a short list of things that are usually considered "material facts" about a property and that should be disclosed.

So, look on the bright side. You don't have termites that fly airplanes over your house.

[MelanieinOrygun]

Whoa, so with all us Portland-based fans, we could totally do a Dark Ops mission and destroy all those man-stealing panty women who are out for your husband...
Or not. I'm pretty sure you're safe, Melissa; no matter how picture-pretty Logan is, he also looks like a nice, loyal husband. Like you didn't already know that, though. :)

[suebobdavis]

Mr Stapler's house has expansive soil so the foundation is lifting in front, settling in back, and has cracks pretty much everywhere. Repair bill: $50,000 - $100,000 plus. The people who sold it to him didn't disclose, though it is pretty clear they knew (we found all the cracks had been carefully patched right before it was sold, and the cabinet doors re-hung because they would swing open since it was not level). So he is suing and his lawyer is at least $1500 a month with no end in sight.

Aw, life is so beautiful sometimes.

[jbeeky]

You should at least open a "man saving panties" Paypal account. Those things sound expensive. In California, man saving panties are delicately embroidered with the phrase, "Community Property Law".

[LB]

Get more quotes- our clean water service piped cracked and turned the front yard into a mudslide. I was sure the house would float right onto the street!anyway quotes to fix it varied greatly, so maybe start gathering some other opinions?
Oh we painted over yucky 80s-neon-slashes-on white wallpaper in our bathroom in a sort of "this is temporary, unless it works" stab. It's shiny, but much, much better than the paper and is holding really well. It's been a few years.

GoodLuck,
LB
not in Portland
wearing a girdle today to dentist in fancy area of town

[wookie]

You are correct, I should have clarified. You are legally obligated to report some kinds of data, as veg4me listed... so you are obligated to say "Roots grew in and clogged the pipe this year, but we had it cleared out. It is the first time it's happened to us."

*But* you are under no obligation (if I understand the potentiality of the problem correctly) to say that one plumber quoted 6-12K to fix the problem. As the plumber pointed out, its a "could be a problem now or 10 years from now". At the very least, you should get another quote to get some perspective on the whole issue and it's impact on your resale potential.

I have high hopes for you and your future sale!

[wiseacres]

This is the house version of the pre-existing health condition -- it's better if you just know nothing about it. If you hear chewing in the walls late at night, just ignore it.

Re: man-saving panties, this always makes me think of the Kevin Bacon movie (She's Having a Baby, I believe) where he pulls the cute little (presumably man-saving) panties out of the laundry basket and looks at them wistfully, then pulls out the ginormous pregnancy panties that no one wears anymore and sighs dramatically. But remember, at the end of that movie, Kevin realized he was being an asshole.

[TeriLynn]

As Chris would say, "Don't worry. I got a guy." Let me talk to him & see if we can't get this guy to give you a cheaper estimate.

It might help...

-miao.

[Deb]

Lots of us Portlanders reading here!!

Hey everybody!

And how cool is TeriLynn and her "guy"....In my experience, people who know "a guy" rock! Here's hoping!

Melissa, I agree that you need to disclose b/c Karma is a REAL bitch. AND I believe someone will still buy your house. Who knows who or why they would but lots of people will sweetie....just do it, see it and believe it.

[Julie]

Wookie is right, and your karmic destiny will be intact, if you state that, "you have had a problem with the roots and pipe, but the experts said that the yearly drain snaking is a preventive measure" or something to that effect. Especially if they cannot say collapse is imminent. Definitely get another opinion, though.

Good luck.

[BLTC]

Maybe we should all put on our man-saving panties and be really, really good so Karma will sell Melissa's house and keep Logan away from slutty out-of-town women.

[PK]

What you need to do is find a plumber who needs a house and likes his work. Because it wouldn't cost the plumber $12,000.
And because it's so easy to find obsessive plumbers.
Okay, this idea is getting crappier by the second. Dammit. It started out so good in my head...