Moms gone wild, within reason.

This weekend was so fun, it's nearly Thursday and I'm still sad it's all over.

As we pulled away from our final travel companion's house we noted how this weekend was: "Moms Gone Wild, Only Define Wild Because It's Pretty Wild That We Have This Whole Five Hour Drive To Talk Without Stopping To Wipe Anyone's Ass But Our Own."

And we talked for five hours straight and were only interrupted by each other (not children with actual needs to be met) and every time the conversation turned to something like, say, Yard Waste Tags, someone would scream, "WOOOO! MOMS GONE WILD!"

But seriously, do you have to put a tag on your can with a 'Yard Waste' sticker already on it? Do you have any idea how these fees add up?

Yes, moms gone totally and completely wild.

At every bar downtown we were absolutely appalled at the prices for cocktails. ("Fifteen dollars? I could buy an entire dinner for a family of six for this price! And with the leftovers I could feed the entire country of Guam!") I myself was so appalled I simulated oral sex in front of a stranger and then reenacted the act all night long for my friends. Much to the delight of the onlooking stranded business men surrounding us.

But then, as we moved north, we found beer to be normal priced. We ducked into Schubas simply to ask how much a pint of Sierra Nevada cost ($3), we were relieved but we didn't order one. Do you want us to have a nap in the middle of the day? BUDGET MINDED MOMS GONE WILD!

At the end of our first night in Chicago, we came back to our hotel room (which we'd stockpiled with Gatorade. MOMS GONE WILD!) and washed our faces and brushed our teeth. Then, I did the wildest thing of all. I put a Breathe Rite strip over my nose. And as I looked at myself in the mirror I thought, "Oh, you are wild."

Now, we're home and I'm sort of as wild as I was only I'm wiping the ass of someone who is not me and I'm not wearing a Breathe Rite strip (Logan thinks my snoring is adorable). I'm now waiting for the end of July and all those wild moms.

Ladies, rest assured I have a nearly full box of Breathe Rite strips just waiting for Blogher.

I will never forget waiting for the train at Belmont and Andrea looking over the street where a little fair was going on and a boy with his head inside a television walked by. She was standing thinking and said, "I just can't believe how all my responsibilities are back home and I'm here."

And the sun was shining and the night was open and it felt so, so good.

You know, responsibilities are great but Breathe Rite strips are better. MOMS GONE WILD!!!!

Comments

[foodmomiac]

When I was in Chicago on business recently, I had to buy my client a pack of cigarettes. They were EIGHT DOLLARS!!!

And, those strips? I wouldn't worry. I'm sure us bloghers will all agree with Logan that your snoring is adorable. :-)

[tallnlucky]

I think that's the pure sign of true love forever (your husband thinking your snoring is cute)

I will try to be more gentle in my midsection karate chops next time R. saws in my ear.

[jennster]

YAY! see you at blogher!!! well, i'll see you, but you won't know who the fuck i am! lol

[Rhi]

I am living vicariously through your weekend in Chicago - as I am here right now and the only time I have left my hotel today is once to go to Staples, and another time to go to Office Max. Now, that, is wild.

booooooooooo....

But, on another note, there is an "intimacy" kit in my mini bar that I really want to buy to give to a friend. But, I am just afraid it would show up on my corporate hotel bill.

[Charlene Prince Birkeland]

better a breathe right strip then a biore strip (remember when those were in?). blogher her we come!

[Melissa Summers]

foodmomiac: you may think I don't need a breathe rite strip, but you're not sharing a hotel with me after I maybe have too much to drink and saw the night away.

[chris]

Do we have to bring breathe rite strips to Blogher... is there a packing list, like summer camp?

Anyway, I am looking so forward to July.

[Cheryl]

I used to live right down the street from Schubas and I have spent more than my fair share of time there. They used to have fabulous music there and the beer is relatively cheap indeed. Like most towns I've been to, everything is cheaper outside of the primarily tourist areas.

[Fireflower]

Moms Gone Wild! Is that somehow related to the new acronym, SAHMILF? I wonder if they have a secret clubhouse, or if it's a traveling playdate sort of thing.

[Peggasus]

Sierra Nevada for only three bucks? In the city? I would have moved in.

Was it beautiful here last weekend or what?

What.

I hope had a chance to check out Millenium Park. It is truly world class.

[LB]

Schubas is the best! And the shows are cheap too. It is my favorite. Hubby and I happily leave the kids with their cranky grandpa to catch shows there, even tho we get home soooo late.

Glad you had fun! Those downtown prices are so bad! Hey, I took a tip from you recently and we ate at BucdiBeppo on Rush, last week to celebrate something & we ate in the kitchen, kids loved it!

[Mrs X]

I wish those breathe rite strips worked on my dh!

I am trying to imagine what it's like to go an hour without being interrupted by a child. So jealous!!

[chirky]

Those strips - do they actually work? Or do you just think they work because you're asleep and don't know any better.

I feel an experiment coming on.

[chirky]

Oh, heavens. I ended my question with a period and there's no way to edit it.

Fretting.

[Melissa Summers]

The girls said I didn't snore. Maybe they were just passed out? I don't know.

[Deb]

Hey! I used to live in Chico, where Sierra Nevada is MADE baby!

Now I am homesick....

YOu so deserved that time away, sounds like such a blast!

[TeriLynn]

Ah, but was there any scrambled porn on the hotel tv? I'm playing in ohio tonight, and I am praying we get a crappy old motel room with scrambled porn.
-miao.

[Christine]

I am soooo jealous. I want to be in on Mom's Gone Wild. Man I wish you lived in Iowa so we could hang out. ;)

Glad you had a good time. Sounds like a blast.