It turns out Blog readers are excellent Amway resellers....

How much do I like posting every day? Here's my scantron answer (in honor of election day):

I didn't want to say I'd be posting every day, but it's already day 8 and I've posted every day, even the weekends! Even the weekends! Yes I know these posts are not going to win me any chocolate but since when has blogging given me any chocolate?

Today I volunteered at the kid's school in the position of "Person Who Asks, "Are you here to vote?" And Then Points Toward The Stairs."

I was a little bit excited about volunteering at school on election day. I expected everyone to be happy about voting.

"Hi! Are you here to vote?"

"Yes I am!"

"Let's share in this awesome privilege we have! Democracy! WOOO!"

Instead it was more like this:

"Why isn't that side door opened?"

"Uh...we have to be able to monitor who's coming into the school."

"I don't care about that. It's raining!"

These are some lazy voters. School shootings be damned, these people can't walk 20 extra steps!

Another interaction:

"Hi! Are you here to vote?"

Unpleasant Voter: "Oh, are you here to direct people to the polls?"

"Yes I am!" [Smile.]

Unpleasant Voter: "What they really need is someone directing people to the entrance of the building because it's hard to find."

"Ha! That's so funny!" [But thinking: "Are you fucking kidding me? You can't find the fucking entrance of a building? The big stone facade didn't tip you off? The big sign saying, "Vote Here" with an arrow pointing toward the door didn't tip you off? You're going to vote right now? Seriously?"]

PS: It looks like the Amway pitch worked on Michigan about as well as it worked on Logan and I 10 years ago. Yes, we were pitched.

Have you been pitched? From what I understand [your job/non-job] makes you an excellent candidate for this business opportunity.

Comments

[Karen Sugarpants]

Stinkin' volunteering for people like that sucks. I worked a Bingo Hall last year for my son's hockey team and almost punched a lady in the face. I even found it for you if you want a laugh: http://tinyurl.com/tdmvh
Karen
xo

[Suebob Davis]

Thanks for this great opportunity! I can't wait to take advantage of it and to try and sell useless crapola to my family and friends, who will soon learn to check the caller ID to make sure it isn't me!

[gorillabuns]

unfortunately, any idiot can vote. this includes lazy people as well as people who can't find the front door to buildings even if it bit them on the ass. really, it kinda scares me. shouldn't there be a voting exam before you vote to test your ability to handle the task at hand?

[Carolyn]

I still can't figure out why Amway isn't considered a pyramid scheme. The people on the top keep getting richer (see Dick DeVos) and the people on the bottom do all the work.

[doahleigh]

As a Michigan resident, I was pretty damn happy last night when DeVos conceded. I mean come one, did anybody really think that man could run a state? It scared me to think that there was a chance he might get to try.

[lastewie]

My sister's favorite campaign slogan this year was "We Don't Want Betsy's Dick." Poor thing used to work in marketing at Scamway headquarters in Ada. I'm really glad I left GR...

[Mocha]

People will complain about ANYTHING. The front of a building? Geez. I would have loved to retort, "Hmmm. Do you really think you are capable of voting if you had trouble finding the entrance? I think not. You should go home now and call both your friends to see which has possession of your brain cells."

I'm bitchy that way. I also work in a school where some of these idiots (ahem! "voters") needed to enter to practice their democratic skills. Mostly I was just pissed that they took all the parking spots.