Things I could have written this week but I didn't. Sorry.

Remember when I wrote about Max's hyper class? And I mentioned how some of the kids who have the full-day program are a little hyper? And some people thought I was saying kids with working parents are shit heads? (I wasn't.)

Yesterday while we waited for the teacher to open the door to school, Max played with another little boy (the son of the Pizza Coupon Mom). This little boy enjoys wrestling and doesn't watch the clues that maybe the kid he's holding onto by the neck isn't actually having fun. His intent never seems entirely mean spirited, he's just sort of not able to tone it down once he gets going with the physical stuff.

Max has tried telling him, "I don't like it when you do that. Please stop!" (I gave him that tactic. He hates me now, because duh, the kid doesn't listen.) Max has screamed at him before in frustration. I have talked to him before, getting down on his level and telling him, "A---, Max really likes playing with you, but he doesn't like it when you grab him like this. You need to stop or he won't play with you anymore."

Yesterday, they were playing again and I looked over to see A--- grabbing Max by the coat and shoving him into the fence. Max hit his head on the metal fence as he was shoved over and over and I've never seen Max get so angry. He just started pounding on the other little boy with his mittened hands screaming, "I TOLD YOU I DON"T LIKE THIS!!!!!"

I was at once horrified and thrilled.

A--- had the nerve to start to cry because "Max hit me."

Thankfully his mother saw the head ramming part of the altercation so there was no awkward, "Well, I'm sorry my son pummelled your son, but it's been a long time coming" conversation.

All this to tell you I think it's clear now. A---'s mother is a stay at home mother, so obviously, all kids with stay at home parents are shit heads.

In other school related news, I can't go into this minute because I'm late, I've been forced to be social at kindergarten drop off to protect me from The Stalker Couple (who are both apparently stay at home parents....all stay at home parents are freaks). I am afraid of Stalker Couple (who have called me 9 times in the last 4 days and went so far as to follow me home one day after drop off.) (FOLLOWED ME HOME.) so I am being very chatty with all the women I'd felt quite lukewarm about before. I'm still relatively lukewarm but there is safety in numbers.

Last thing. On Friday night we invited ourselves to the Juniper home, you think I'm kidding but I seriously did.

Over the course of the night Logan got a little verbose and in an effort to show Dutch and Wood that even though he doesn't have a blog like the rest of us, he has Opinions! And Thoughts! And he does, but sometimes, when one has a few glasses of Jameson, those thoughts aren't all that well thought out.

By the end of the night the conversation looked like this:

Logan: "Did you see they're screening movies at the Vatican!? What the fuck?"

Us: "Yeah. Well it's a religious movie right?"

Logan: "I know but WHAT THE FUCK???"

Us: "Yeah."

Logan: "I have to go to the bathroom."

Us: Moving along to other topics.

Logan (back from bathroom): "Seriously! What the fuck is with the Vatican showing movies!?"

(I'm not kidding he came back from the bathroom and started right back up.)

Us: Wow.

The next day I emailed Dutch and Wood thanking them for having us over and told them how Logan was planning to start a blog called "What the Fuck!"

Dutch wrote back with this.

Bloggers as friends = Awesome.

Comments

[Nuisance]

In social situations, I'm always the Logan.

What the fuck is up with that?

Dutch is hysterical. Wood is hip to end all hip-ness. You're lucky to have such cool friends.

[CursingMama]

When I hear this story I imagine Max on top of the kid - swearing like me and just going crazy. Just like it happens in this movie

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085334/

Of course I'm a working mom who used to be a stay at home mom - so you should see what a mess my kids are.

[alh]

When I first read you story I thought the A---- was a stand in for Asshole! HA! That makes the story even better.

[VenturaMom]

Dutch rocks. Just like Logan's hair in that picture.

[Allison Hasel]

Oh dear God. Love Logan's blog. I found Sweet Juniper through your blog and oh what a delight! You are lucky to have hilarious and thoughtful blogger friends. I bet you all are a riot together!

[Meg]

Dutch makes me laugh harder than almost anyone else on the whole internet.

[Abbey]

HOLY CRAP! That was Fan-Freaking-Tastic!!

I think Logan's blog should be kept up...just not by him...how FUNNY could that be???

Love it!

PS Almost fell off my chair when I saw the I LOVE RAINBOWS and KITTENS... : )

[Wood]

Free Logan!

[Emily]

Holey shit that was great. Dutch is too good for his own good.

[Justbeachy]

Sounds like we need t-shirts. I am a SAHM and my kids are shitheads, or SAHM Freak. But, why is stalker parents stalking you? Did I miss something?

Love the Logan page, I agree, it should be kept up, but not by him, I mean how much what the fuck could go on there?

[Justbeachy]

why is? why are? Why are stalker parents stalking you. Yes, that is what I meant.

[andrea from the fishbowl]

OMG - I'm still laughing. Pickle icon and everything. And yes, you should totally keep it up.

[soukii]

That is so funny. Is the logansummers.com site for real?? I'm assuming not. Who made that one? I think the pickle dance should be the new "it" dance!

[Judypooh]

I think I laughed my spleen up! WTF? Won't I need that for the movie screening at the Vatican? WHAT THE FUCK!

That's fabulous. Dutch rocks.

[Brian]

As a stay-at-home dad of three girls, I would happily purchase a family pack of Freak & Shithead t-shirts. We'd wear them proudly as we walk through the streets of our suburban town.

In fact, that would be an awesome name for a band: Freak and the Shitheads.

Nobody take it, it's mine.

[Mytiroo]

I absolutely love your response to the responses of your previous article. All parents are freaks . . . they only group you havent covered are the part timers!! :-)

Thanks for the links to the other blogs, they look really interesting and funny.

[roaringmommy]

That is the funniest thing I've seen all day. Love the dancing pickle.

[Jessica]

THAT .... is priceless!!!!!

[Dirka]

What the Fuck?!?!?