News-Like Product.

I don't usually watch my local news. But I watched it tonight because I was up trying to finish my post for The Buzz Off.

These are the reasons I don't like watching my local news.

On very cold nights, the weather man declares a "Cuddle Alert".

"Coming up next: We test coffee from local shops to find out if your decaf is really decaf." (Dear God, have been getting extra caffeine all this time? I am suing.)

It's snowing here and all night my local newscaster was coming up at every commercial break to declare: "It's snowing! TAKE COVER! We're all going to die!"

It is 11:55pm on Tuesday.

I am supposed to publish the Buzz Off on Tuesday and Thursday. I am technically on deadline but you know I think Tuesday morning is what I'm aiming for. It just took me a while to come up with an idea.

But I did and I found some cute Alphabet themed items. You should think about going to take a look.

Comments

[seekoh]

I can only watch if I remember that at any moment they could deteriorate into Lord of the Flies like SNL's "Wake up and Smile."

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/95/95hsmile.phtml

[jenB]

I watched the Detroit affiliate of NBC tonight for a couple of hours. Now I know which schools will be closed! How handy to know from 3000 miles away!*

*please don't die

[Kyran]

The cuddle alert is only acceptable if the weatherman is flamboyantly gay. Then it is a public service announcement.

[BOSSY]

Bossy's favorite weatherman moment occurred on the eve of what turned out to be a nothing snow flurry which fizzled into rain. But that didn't stop the weatherman from declaring, "The entire region is staring down the barrel of a shot gun."

[SpartanFan]

Hi Melissa,
I, too, am in the Detroit area and, when it's a slow news night, it's all about the snow. On the 11pm news last night, the cameraman was walking and pointing the camera at his feet whilewalking through a few inches of snow in the dark, with only the light from the camera illuminating his boots. It looked like something from the Blair Witch Project! How much hype can you create around snow...in Michigan! If this were Florida, I'd understand all the excitement. But it snows here. All.the.time.
Are your kids off today? My son is and so am I. My students will be thrilled and won't have to protest (again) Refer to last week's news if you don't know what I'm talking about.
Take care and stay warm!

[Melissa Summers]

Yes, we're off and next week is midwinter break. I know you're torn, because you're a teacher but I hate snow days.

I saw that news. I especially loved the kid who said, sans hat, with an unzipped coat "I know a few kids who came to school frozen."

What? How about a hat boys?

Then they had a parent on who said, "If my son was one of the protestors, then I'm proud of him for standing up for what he believes in."

Lady? Your kid 'believes' in getting a day off school. Gah.

[Pants]

When I took my pants off last night, my underwear came with them. I discovered them in my pant leg today on the shuttle into work and prayed they’d stay put until I got to the bathroom.

They did.

[SpartanFan]

Melissa, you and I could become fast friends! I won't even go into the "protest of 2007 (because we have one at least every other year)," but you're preaching to the choir over here. The reasons I don't like snow days are: 1) it puts me behind and we're all held to a very tightly scheduled syllabus/time line and 2) My child attends a different district than where I teach and our snow days and vacations never seem to overlap, so finding child care is tough when he's off (2 days last week) and I'm not.

[jeff]

Don't be hating on Gaidica! The man is unimpeachable -- just look at his hair and teeth! You should instead focus your wrath on that sniveling weasel Jerry Hodak.

[TeriLynn]

I DID almost die this morning, about 1 hour into my 1 3/4 hour drive into work (that normally takes 20 minutes). I almost shot myself. I had to stumble through knee-high snowdrifts to even get in my car. The roads in the suburbs aren't that bad, but I just DARE you to drive i-75 north between Trumbull and Gratiot. Seriously. NO plowing. It's not like this snow was unexpected- it's been advertised on the news like the Apocolypse, for god's sake.

oy.
-miao.

[dutch]

I like the Detroit news channel whose slogan is "where no news is good news." I mean, I don't watch it or anything, but I like that that's their slogan.

[dutch]

I like the Detroit news channel whose slogan is "where no news is good news." I mean, I don't watch it or anything, but I like that that's their slogan.

[Melissa Summers]

They should actually say, "Where no news means OVERDRAMATIC reporting of inane topics!!!"

[Lisa]

Hey, I like Jerry Hodak! I am so sick of these snow days too, especially since we're approaching mid-winter break and they're home for a whole week. At least they got this snow storm predicted relatively correctly. Usually they tell us were going to be burried in 10 feet of snow, we should run to the stores and stock up like it's the end of the world and then we barely get a dusting.

A couple of years ago our district got to us "snow days" at the end of May...now that's something you don't usually plan for ~ but at least the kids can go outside and play for 8, 10, 12 hours and not worry about frostbite. Those were for Clinton River flooding.

[pnuts mama]

when we lived in upstate NY there was a weatherman who used to announce it was a "hug your honey" night, which my suprememly creative husband re-interpreted to be a "hump your honey" night- lovely.

we are having some type of an ice-storm thing here in NY and it sucks- mostly cause we haven't had any decent snow yet!! is it too much to ask for one decent dumper of snow this season? my kid's brand new unused snowsuit sits waiting lonely and dejected in the drawer. all we want is 5-6 inches of the fluffy stuff. who needs this ice crap? but yes, our local news stations are having a field day with it. ICE! ICE! ICE! AHHH!! WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!! LET'S TALK ABOUT IT SOME MORE!!

[pnuts mama]

*supremely
clearly the ice has frozen my fingers as well.

[pnuts mama]

*supremely
clearly the ice has frozen my fingers as well.

[kathy]

Melissa, totally off this topic, BUT I wanted to THANK YOU for your valentine ideas on the Buzz Off. I use the CD cover with the cookie one for 2 of my kids (the 5th grader is too cool to have homemade valentines!) and they were a hit. You rock!

THANKS!
Kathy

[AmyB]

Here in Denver, they like to send reporters all over the city to stand out in the cold and scoop up handfuls of snow to show us viewers. Genius.

Also, they recently started off the newscast with a story about how you can ACTUALLY DIE from slipping on the ice. Beware!

Amy

[Gullebarn]

We finally got some snow, like two inches, and people are dancing in the streets. We have had nothing, not a drop, all year. Our newspeople are really, really excited here.

[Donna]

It goes to show you that local TV news sucks no matter where you live. Especially during February sweeps, when they pile on the breathless reports on restaurant health violations and call it "news." No wonder most of us are now getting our news from the Internet.

[Head Squawker Michele]

You should live in Texas. When it snows or is icy, they just cancel all the regularly scheduled programs and start broadcasting about which grocery stores still have milk, bread and water available. It's truly sad.