Somehow this all relates.

From Maggie's Book. No one cares what you had for lunch.

#42 Make Your Timeline

Age under 1: I have febrile seizures and am raced to the hospital wrapped in frozen vegetables. It's Roseola.

Age 2: I go with my brother's Cub Scout den to Pembroke Park for a picnic. All the big boys are having fun going down the Big Slide. I decide to go down the Big Slide. When I get to the top I can't go down and all the Cub Scouts scream at me to GO DOWN in a way quite unbecoming for a future Boy Scout. My brother saves me by climbing up the slide and going down with me.

Age 3: The babysitter calls my mother telling her I'm "Melancholy". My mother doesn't know what that word is, thinks it means feverish and races home.

Age 4: I am attending Bo Jangles Preschool and am in love with a boy named Bo. His mother has crocheted his little rug we sit on in circle time with his name "BO" in the middle.

Age 5: On the first day of Kindergarten the class goes back inside after recess only I don't notice. I'm on the playground with another boy from my block. We walk four blocks home because I don't know what else to do.

Age 8: My mother crafts a pilgrim costume out of an old pair of sheets for a class play. No one else wears their costume for the dress rehearsal, I am mortified and then stuck in the outfit at the end of the day when I can't undo the knot in my apron. I appear to believe if I miss the bus, I will die on the spot. Fortunately, I did not die or miss the bus. Unfortunately, the teacher now realizes I am a giant ball of nerves.

Age 10: I design a patch for a state-wide Girl Scout camp event. The entire state's division votes on the best one from the 50 or so shown. Mine, with it's girl-centric rainbow and clouds theme, wins. I decide I'm an artist.

Age 15: A popular boy with a used car salesman name tells me during science class, "You would be really pretty if you wore make up." I am sort of flattered by this comment. My girlfriend tells me what an asshole-ish thing that was to say.

Age 23: I attend Richard Washington's 2D design class at Eastern Michigan University and pretty quickly realize I am not an artist but rather an astute observer of the things other people are doing. Mr. Washington confirms this nearly every day during class.

Age 30: I start a blog.

hmmmmm......

Comments

[amypt]

Camp Whispering Woods by any chance?

[angie]

Thanks for reminding me about that book - I need the inspiration.

Also, since today is delurking day, Hi! I'm delurking......I read daily and can relate to so much of what you write.

I've been so happy for how happy you are since your move - you deserve it - sit back and enjoy!

[srah]

I like the "Melancholy" story. It reminds me of my mom's story about how she came home and told her mother there was no bathroom at school. The teacher kept talking to the class about the restroom, but my mom didn't care about that because she didn't need to rest.

Also... *DELURK*!

[witchypoo]

Was Richard Washington implying that you were a copycat?
Also, apparently lots of folk care what you had for lunch, and also how your family enjoyed it ;)

[jbeeky]

Dude, I think I had a badge like that!!!

[Melissa Summers]

Mr Washington just implied that I sucked.

Whispering Woods sounds familiar. I wish I could remember because I lost the badge and would love to have it back.

It was a rainbow with a cloud at the bottom and instead of gold there were a bunch of the little girl scout insignias dancing at the bottom.

[Kristin]

OMFG I think I have that badge on my old Girl Scout vest.....

[AmyinMotown]

Hm. I took a very similar art class at Michigan State. Worse was the poetry class where we had to write a poem at the end--mind you I had written award-winning poems in high school-- and was damned with faint praise. Humiliating. Still pulled an A in the class though, so bite me, TA with the unemployable speciality.

I also had a by say something similar to me as a teen. Now, I realize he was a dick, back then I thought it was legitimate criticism. Please God let my daughter be smarter than me.

[Keely]

I've been lurking for a while now and apparently today is the day to come clean. Love your blog, I'm glad you started it. :)

[Bethiclaus]

That popular boy's comment? Yeah. I think I'd have to agree with your friend.

[Jaycee]

One of my husband's close high school friends said the same thing to me, when my husband and I were first dating. He said it in a very disgusted tone, very dismissively, like I was a huge idiot for not realizing this. What a dick. So, I married my husband just to spite him.

[Marilyn]

Delurking...

I totally need to get that book. The pilgrim costume story sounds just like something that would have happened to me when I was the same age.

[amypt]

The next time I come across my vest (yes, vest, I was a badge overachiever, and outgrew the sash), I'll search for a badge that matches that description. I'll take a photo, send it to you, and we'll see if they match.

[Momo Fali]

My timeline is pretty similar, except that on my first day of Kindergarten my Mom forgot to pick me up. Nice.

[V1ntageJenn]

Oh dear. Today is National Delurking Day? I haven't been into Hallmark in awhile so I didn't know. Excuses, excuses.

I've been hanging around for a minute or so and have really enjoyed your blog. Kudos for age 10!

[peaceful]

I had a boy in High School art class tell me the same thing. The really mortifying part of course was that I was wearing make-up.

[libbyfish]

i had richard washington for 2-d at eastern as well. complete ass.

[3rdcoastkaren]

Delurking to say that I also stayed too long on the playground
building a snowman waay back in kindergarten. I only realized
when my class went by on the sidewalk on their way home..
Ohh the anxiety!!
Now if I could only have flown under the radar like that in
high school!

[Fenicle]

I really need to buy her book!! Maybe I'll put it on my Christmas wish list.

I wanted to say thanks for linking to the IBC post on my site & WhyMommy's! You're spreading a lot of awareness!!

[Cheryl Farmer]

At age 6 or 7, I got sent home from my best friend Shari's house for telling her she was being "haughty". I loved my antique bedtime story books. I think that Cinderella's stepmother was "a cruel and haughty woman", if I remember correctly. So what's wrong with saying that? It made sense to me.

[GetSheila]

OMG! Age 5? Didn't the teacher notice she was missing a couple of kids? Sheesh.