I never post and then all I do is blabber on and on.

A week or so ago Maddie saw the dreaded Maturation Video at school. You know the one where they tell you about your period and body odor and the fact that you'll grow breasts...at some point. I already handled these things with great ease, or not. Still, I did buy her a book and it answered a lot of her questions and kind of narrowed down the things she wanted to know about.

I bought myself a few more years before I have to explain BDSM. Phew.

During the Maturation Video they talked a little about how some girls experience "Mood Swings" as their bodies go through changes.

One day Maddie had a little emotional come apart because the two way radio she walks to school with didn't connect to me right away. She came running into the house, hyperventilating and fighting back tears. I explained to her that, since she'd just walked out the door and I hadn't yet reached the radio which was in the kitchen, about six feet away, I hadn't turned it on.

But see now? I'm turning it on. You're okay, take a deep breath.

Later that afternoon she said, "Remember this morning? When I freaked out about the radio not working? Was that a "Mood Swing"?"

Oh, oh, oh....Dear Sweet Little Madison, you were born on a mood swing and if it's PMS? That either means your body's been waiting for your period for about NINE AND A HALF YEARS or that you're my daughter and a little high strung. Sorry.

******

In other news I just closed out a guide to wonderful summer party dress up clothes for kids at Mighty Junior. Shockingly, we pulled together a lot of great things for girls and boys.

I also came up with a list of 50 Things To Do With Kids Around Detroit Before They Grow Up at the Buzz Off. Surprisingly, not one of them involves a racial stereotype, a joke about crime or a reference to the stupid mayor.

I think it's a good list, but obviously not complete. If you're in the area, give me your best ideas over there in the comments.

Comments

[Maggie]

I remember those coming of age videos. They used to pull us girls into a different classroom to watch ours. You went back into homeroom feeling like you had a secret - YOU KNEW ABOUT MENSTRUATION.

[Christy]

We've been through the school videos (luckily I too had bought a book and gone through it w/my daughter before she saw it at school so as not to tramatize her!) I'm really dreading the sex talk...and I think I may pass it off to my husband!

BTW--I didn't realize that you were near Detroit (don't know why,) but if you're interested, I wrote a post on my blog about how my perspective on Detroit has changed since reading Sweet Juniper and seeing how James Griffioen writes about it. I used to live in Detroit as a kid (under very different circumstances) and it's been enlightening to see a different perspective.
Here's the link:
http://heavyonthecaffeine.typepad.com/heavy_on_the_caffeine/2008/06/one-of-the-blog.html

[Lisame]

THANK YOU! My niece is having her 13th birthday this Sunday. I've been beating my head on the walls trying to find a present. I'll have the book in my hand by the end of today. You have solved the world's mysteries for me.

Bless you great blogger.

[Beth]

While we watched our video, the boys got to do a scavenger hunt. I was pissed.

[Velma]

Oh, my - I JUST gave this exact same book to my daughter (8 1/2) this past weekend. She had a LOT of questions (thanks, 4th graders on the bus!) and we went through it together. I told her if it made her uncomfortable or scared, she could put it away until she wanted to know something else. We've been discussing various things from it for the last 4 days, and mood swings were the thing she most identified with!

[Steph]

You are a far braver soul than I.

I'm considering sending my daughter to military school. They'll make her watch Maturation Videos and have The Talk with her in military school won't they? WON'T THEY?!?!

[jana]

BDSM? I don't remember that in the "coming of age movie." Help.

[Astrogirl]

Huh. So THIS is where it finally pays off to have had a boy? I get to hand off "The Talk" duties on to my husband!

Oh wait - crap. Never mind, I still have to have the talk. Dammit, this is not fair! Not only do I have to have The Talk, I have to unlearn him from all the crap the Hubs will be teaching him!

I'm screwed.

[HouseofJules]

This is one of those times that I'm glad to not have kids because I don't think I'd handle all the serious talks very well. Or someone's mood swings. I know when I was a teenager I NEVER had any (ha ha).
Jules
House of Jules

[Out of Marbles Mommy]

What is BDSM?

[Sandra]

People! For crying out loud. Type BDSM into Google. Don't click on the links if you're easily offended.

[Lisame]

I got the book like I said I would! Great read for girls. Cannot thank you enough!

[JudyPooh]

hehehe I'm crying over here, laughing and crying. My oldest is 9.5 and, dear gawd, I thought I was the ONLY one having the almost CONSTANT conversation with her about 'maturation'. I'm going to get that book for my daughter for her summer reading... then maybe we won't have to have YET ANOTHER discussion about periods when we walk down the tampon/pad section at WalMart. Thanks for the link!

[Deanna]

I swear I read that first line as "masturbation video" about four times before I came to my senses. I was thinking to myself, "They never showed us THAT film in elementary school sex ed! Of course I am from Georgia."

[Krista]

Deanna, it wasn't until the third time that Maturation showed up did I finally have a lightbulb moment and realize that it wasn't masturbation. I was thinking how VERY liberal things have become since I had sex ed.

[Evelyn]

The Redford Theater definitely needs to be added to the list! It's an 80-year-old beautifully-restored movie house which shows older films. Here are some of the highlights: Free 30 min. organ show before each movie, cheap admission and concessions, a cartoon is shown before many of the movies, a 50/50 raffle, ambiance (Japanese-style motif, and a ceiling that makes you feel as if you're outside on a starry night!), etc. Please visit their website for more details, pictures, history, etc.

http://redfordtheatre.com/index.htm

[melissaS]

YES! Good one! It would be perfect to see one of the organ accompanied silent movies!

I'm putting it in the comments there for you.

[lisa]

Thank God I'm not the only one that saw masturbation in the first line. I couldn't imagine a school showing that video.

My now 11 year old daughter was given that book at age 9 by her grandmother. I am so thankful for that book.

[Jenn @ Juggling Life]

Just wait for the next class--you can discuss oral sex and chlamydia!

[Suze]

Isn't blabbering on and on a prerequisite for bloggers?
My 16 y/o asked me about shaving the other day. Not legs. He's a guy. His face. How the hell would I know - I don't shave my face....(or my legs, but don't tell, it's winter here).

[Sarah Cunningham]

Videos? Oh, now I feel old because I distinctly remember FILMS when I got The School-Sanctioned Talk. The big round metal reels of shiny brown film, the military-grade film projector that weighed a ton and was wheeled into the room by a bigshot: a geek from AV department, who grows up and later directs BDSM videos. You know what I'm talkin' about ;)

[amyz5]

great post. THAT brought back such memories for me.

first, the smell of the auditorium of my elem. school with my mother sitting next to me watching 'the movie' (quite different in 1969, i can assure you)

second, carpooling my now 15-year-old-son a few years back:
him: saw 'the movie' today.
me: hmmm. how did that go for ya?
him: well, let's say i have a much better understanding of my sister now! (she is 3 years older)
me: and... anything else? any questions?
him: nope, i'm good.

whatever makes us think a kid wants to talk to their mom about this?

[amyz5]

great post. THAT brought back such memories for me.

first, the smell of the auditorium of my elem. school with my mother sitting next to me watching 'the movie' (quite different in 1969, i can assure you)

second, carpooling my now 15-year-old-son a few years back:
him: saw 'the movie' today.
me: hmmm. how did that go for ya?
him: well, let's say i have a much better understanding of my sister now! (she is 3 years older)
me: and... anything else? any questions?
him: nope, i'm good.

whatever makes us think a kid wants to talk to their mom about this?

[califmom]

Glad to know I wasn't the only one who read "Maturation video" as Masturbation video. I had the recent opportunity to explain prostitution to my 11 yo son. Thanks NPR.

[Rebecca]

I wonder how the different states and cities handle the maturation video? I recently opted out for my 11 yr old daughter seeing the video. Last year it was all about hygeine and her period. This year it got into boys wanting to be "physical" and what an ejaculation was (I watched the parent preview). The girls and boys are still seperated, but next year, when they watch the "what sex is" video (with a cartoon of intercourse, I understand) the girls and boys will be together in the class. We will be opting out of that class too. I will have "the talk " this summer. I can do just fine without a video.

[janey]

I don't have a Madison but I have a Maia who will face the same challenges.

At least we know what they are up against though, won't have to suffer suffer in silence as we did.

[Priscilla]

Thank you for posting about this...I have an 8 year old and I know that I need to have the talk with her. I am going to get that book to help me explain it to her!! I know a little girl who got her period at 8 last month! The mom tried for an hour to explain it all to her and it didn't go too well. I need to talk to mine beforehand! Thanks again!!