Other Places: The Someone Else Should Be The Mom Now Edition

The children have threatened to physically assault me if I don't do "something fun" with them today. I'm not particularly worried about the physical damage they can do to me, I'm pretty strong and know a few ninja moves. I am however concerned about the emotional trauma the two of them can inflict on me with their guilt trips. The unending guilt trips.

Did you know, for example, that trying to hug and tickle Maddie while she's acting bored and 13 and then sticking a (not all that sticky anymore) mustache on her Hannah Montana poster to get a laugh, means I HATE her and NEVER listen to her.

Dinner conversation was lovely last night....

I guess this marks the beginning of the end of my positive attitude about the summer. I am now officially counting down the days until they go back to school and we have a little space to ourselves. Because right now, I'm really fighting back the desire to stick all the remaining mustaches from the party we had Saturday on every Hannah Montana/Ashley Tisdale/Selena Gomez/Jonas Brothers poster in her room.

That's about how mature I'm feeling.

I also kind of want to put my finger about 1 millimeter away from her face and say, over and over, "I'm not touching you."

So I guess we'll be going to see a movie. Max will have to sit between Maddie and I to keep me from giving her a wet willy.

In other less antagonizing and childish news....

Yesterday I closed out the Back To School guide at Mighty Junior.

Maddie and I also made Button Pendant necklaces at The Buzz Off.

I guess that wasn't enough fun, now I've gotta take them to buy ponies.

Comments

[ashley]

I find it rather ironic that the advertisement on your blog is all about Miley Cyrus right now. SPOOKY.

[Jenni]

I feel your pain. Welcome to my world!

I cannot wait for school to start. I'm counting the days. We start on 8/18, and it will most certainly not come soon enough.

[Erin]

Ah...I can't wait for my son to become a sullen teenager. Oh wait, yes I can!! Luckily I have a few more years to prepare!

[Anne]

I told my husband the other day that I finally hit the "summer wall" - tired of planning things to do, tired of going places, tired of trying to be willing to sit outside while she rides her bike for nine hours per day. School doesn't start here until September 2nd - kill me now!

[Meg]

Oh dear.
I sort of can't wait for school to start either, but my kid is only nine months old. I have a while to go.

[Becky]

14 days until the big yellow angel swoops back down to take them away.
14 days.

[Peeved Michelle]

I hope I have kids who would rather go out and play than have me think of a billion entertaining things to do. I am trying to remember what I did in the summers as a kid. I mostly recall riding bikes, climbing trees and running through sprinklers. Maybe I spent time at friends' houses, but I think we were still usually doing those things. I guess we watched cartoons in the afternoon, too.

[Katrina]

Sounds like we are all having fun!!!!

[Lindsay]

Hilarious. I can't wait to have kids - I already know I will be able to relate to this post. The Lindsay of 5-years-from-now thanks you.

[Jenn @ Juggling Life]

That's why I've learned not to vacay too early in the summer--you need a little sumpin sumpin to look forward to!

[kristi]

I once actually wanted to say "I know you are but what am I" to my 5 year old daughter. Astounding.

[Tina]

LOVE the "You don't love me/you hate me/etc." drama episodes. (I have TWO girls.) My responses to those usually are not the most mature. Anyway, it sounds like our "balanced calendar" would be more your style. This is my kids' second full week of school. They'll have off two weeks in the fall, winter, and spring and get out at the end of May. At each break, even summer, about the time you want to strangle them, it's time to go back to school.

[Mitzi]

I LOVE that you put a mustache on Hannah Montana. I love that it made her mad. You crack me up. I hope I think to do that when my daughters get old enough to hang posters on the wall.

My 5-year-old started Kindergarten yesterday. I only cried for 3 hours. I'm glad school is back in session though.

[Michele]

I'm glad to hear I am not the only one who is ready to send the kids back to school! I think I've figured out the problem... we were so busy with swim team, swim team practice, trips, camp, all of that, they didn't have time to get bored. Now all of that has ended and we're having "unstructured" time, they are miserable. Whoever said kids have too many scheduled activities needs to spend the summer at our house!

[Velma]

19 more days until school starts here.

[Calee]

I have a 1 1/2 year old and I can't wait for school. Seems like some days all I do is wait for her to go to bed.

[lisa]

Yep, my son (7) has tons of friends to play with in the sub, my daughter (12) has 2 and neither one of them has been home 98% of the summer. We've done a long weekend up north, a week of day camp and a week of camping so far. Next week will be spent on Mackinac Island then I have to kill 2 more weeks...I'll be starting the countdown as soon as we get back home from the island.

[Kia]

That's the thing with kids, isn't it? The more artsy-crafty, we'll-go-shopping-at-the-toystore, let's-do-some-more-fun-kid-stuff things we give them, the more they demand. I'll spend some good "floor time" with my Little Man and be quite pleased with myself that I was so generous with my time, then he turns around and asks for "5 more minutes." Never satisfied... ;)

[feefifoto]

One week after school starts I know I'm going to be counting the days until it's over so I don't have to get up early in the morning, drive to and from and to and from, argue homework and piano practice, convince people to go to bed, drive some more ...

Until then: only two more weeks. Yay.

[maddyie]

You kept a positive summer attitude into August! Melissa, you are AMAZING. Never doubt it. Summer stinks by mid-June at the latest. :P

[Laura]

My almost 13 y/o son told me last night that he felt wierd and then burst into tears - I thought that was just girl hormones. Lord help me, I still have a girl to go through also.

Chin up, soon it will be all homework to stress you out.

[FamiliesONLY]

Isn't it amazing? How did we get through all the years before they went to school? The countdown has begun here, although mine are leaving next week for 2 weeks with the Grandparents! Woot!

[Bailey]

Where are you? You are usually posting everyday and you haven't been here in a few days! I picture you tied to a chair with the kids torturing you in some way because you didn't do something fun with them.

[Kim]

At this moment I am trying to auction off my girls..I can't stand the summer bickering. I have a terminally ill husband and am very patient with him but am always on the edge with my girls. Wait, watching the lovely Phelps at the moment who just won another gold..what a star.