Life List: Rough Draft Volume 1

One of the things I've learned from being friends with Maggie Mason is how it's okay to dream big. After my last visit out to see her a year ago, I decided I wanted to get better at having ideas. That's something that's had mixed results because, I am a do-er. I'm less good at having huge ideas because I stare up at them and think, "But how will I get the dishes done?"

So very suburban and not surprising considering the life I live, you know in suburban Detroit where every day seems to be all about getting to the next.

Over and over again Maggie has suggested I do a Life List, like hers at Mighty Girl and over and over I've resisted.

Today I thought I'd just throw 25 out there and then I'll throw out 25 more and so on (editing and revising as I go) and pretty soon I'll have 100 things to do before I die.

Let's start.

1 Float down a river on tubes with the kids

(not the fake river at the indoor water park).

2 Overcome my dreadful phone phobia

(I'll be 100 when this one happens).

3 Settle in a new state.

(Austin vs Portland the debate rages on....)

4 Buy fresh flowers for the house once a week for a year.

(I saw this on someone's site and even though Gary will eat them I love the idea)

5 Adopt a dog.

(Stay off Petfinder.com until we're ready for this one.)

6 Take Logan on a surprise trip.

(I have two ideas about where to take him, but can't tell or it won't be a surprise!)

7 Create a repertoire of 5 meals I can prepare from my head and not a recipe.

(Head start!)

8 Finish our wedding album.

(I have all the negatives, just need prints and to place them in an album. The photographer was right! We should have had her do it.)

9 Send a large donation to a charity anonymously.

(Not sure what charity yet, but related to kids.)

10 Live like a local in another city for two months.

(City is as yet undefined, but definitely a city...not someone else's suburban life.)

11 Help someone the way I was helped.

(Purposely left vague....)

12 Surprise Maddie at school with a huge bunch of balloons on her birthday.

(She would be delightfully embarrased and thrilled.)

13 Show Logan all my favorite places in San Francisco.

(And his dream place.)

14 Take a family trip to Disney for an all inclusive vacation.

(Not my dream, but I'd like to see the kids see it. And we've gotta do it before Maddie is too old.)

15 Give a heartfelt, touching, and witty toast in public.

(I just got hives thinking about this one.)

16 Create a favorite family dish my kids will want to make for their own families.

(It will likely not have onions in it.)

17 Go whale watching.

(I saw a tail once on a whirlwind visit to Providence, RI for a funeral.)

18 Learn to like bourbon.

(I turned myself off peach schnapps and bourbon in high school. The taste aversion has been in place since. The schnapps, no big woop, but why did Becky bring bourbon?)

19 See where Logan grew up in Napa.

(He used to ride a skateboard to school. I'm picturing short shorts, long tube socks and a sweat band around his head.)

20 Learn something new with Maddie.

(Not sure what yet but she's at an age where we can do something we both enjoy together and I'm so thankful.)

21 Have a catered party for 50 in our house and yard to celebrate someone else's achievement or milestone.

(Perhaps my toast will be given at this party.)

22 Get Lasik

(By the time I get it maybe they can add on night vision!)

23 Visit every place we've been alone, together.

(Salt Lake City, Amsterdam, London, Lake Tahoe, Cincinnati, Austin, Los Angeles, Portland....we travel solo a lot.)

24 Spend $5000 creating an excellent wardrobe without guilt.

(Paging What Not To Wear.... show them a picture of the bottom of my $15 shoes I'm thinking of having resoled.)

25 Rent a house with another family on a lake for a week in the summer.

(Hopefully a family we like.)

Do you have a list? Share a link or throw it in the comments.

Comments

[k]

You know, "What Not To Wear" IS looking for applicants AND they'll be filming in Detroit this year. I'm thinking you have to get someone to sign you up!!!

[AshleyN]

OK the perfect place to go tubing... Ginnie Springs. It's in Florida near Gainesville... about an hour outside Orlando.On a hot summer day in July, the water temp is still in the lows 70s and crystal clear. The water quality is so perfect, they bottle the water for Dannon a few miles upstream :)

[hydrogeek]

You could also tube down the river at San Marcos, which is just south of Austin, while you're in Austin debating number 3 and accomplishing part of number 23.

[Clair]

The Russian River is also great for tubing, and it's not too far from Napa. I've already accomplished some big things on my list, and next up is karaoke. I'm terrified.

[Lisa]

oooh, I like this... kinda like a bucket list without the bucket! And I like the little goals that won't cost a fortune or make you nuts ("learn something new with Maddie" for instance). Was reading a blog called "The Power of Small" - I'm thinking you've got it down cold!

Lisa

[Nora]

I heard a rumor the Tonga room might be closing. So do that one first (and you can take a whale watching trip out to the Farallones while you're here!).

Oh, and I'm totally stealing the fresh flowers idea.

[Jenny]

I second the tubing in Texas idea. New Braunfels is a great old German town just north of San Antonio, and you can tube down the Guadalupe River there.

[kate]

I've been thinking of starting one too....and since I'm avoiding actual work today, perhaps I should start right now...

Here I go.

[Sue]

On my birthday in grade five, my parents sent a dozen helium balloons to me at school - via a clown. It truly was thrilling.

[Erin]

Love this idea...I should start thinking of my own. As for your wedding album, I highly recommend Kolo albums...classic and afforable!

[Alice]

Oh no about the Tonga Room! Back in my days working for a for-profit, we had some Christmas parties there - it's a really awesome location, and I know Logan would love it.

This is a great list.

[Kelly M.]

I dont have a list, but I do have a horrible phobia of the phone. No one has ever understood why, not even me. I have lost good friends over the fact that I am actually scared to answer the phone when they call and scared to call them back. Again, I have no clue what I am scared of.

Just wanted you to know your not alone.

Good luck with the list, you have some really great things on there.

[kate]

Here's the first installment of mine. It's so fun to think about and put them in writing. Thanks for the inpiration!

http://sweetpot8o.blogspot.com/

[ashley]

I've got a list that I keep on the side bar of my blog. (scroll down) I've only accomplished 2 of the items so far, and I keep adding to the list, so it is a work in progress.

[Heather]

Austin, Austin! WAY better than Portland. Less rain, more margaritas. We love suburban bliss in Austin!!! :)

[Becky]

Oh Melissa I thought for sure your list was going to go the way Michael Ian Black's list went!

http://www.michaelianblack.net/blog/2009/03/the-fuck-it-list-goes-big-time.html

But I like yours anyway!

[Nothing But Bonfires]

Yes, the Tonga Room is closing soon -- quick, quick, quick! Or you and Logan will get there and all you'll find are CONDOS in place of the awesome lake with the band playing in the middle of it while it "rains." And what a disappointment that would be!

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2009/02/25/BAS1164CAH.DTL&tsp=1

[Jules]

Austin is a great place to visit, living there is another thing. Their idea of "ethnic food", is Tex Mex. School starts at 7:30AM, and football is king. If your kids aren't athletic, it wouldn't be the best fit. It's so g-damn hot. You don't know hot til 100 plus days for nearly a month. If you do go with Austin, live as close to downtown as possible. The subusrbs are conservative. Remember, it's Texas afterall!
I think Portland would be a better fit for your family.

[Angela]

All of these seem totally do-able. Reach for mind-blowingly impossibly things in vol. 2.

[Elizabeth]

I think your answer to #3 should be Austin because then you can do #1 (tubing) very easily. Tubing happens on the Frio, Comal or Guadalupe (pronounced GUAD-A-LOOP if you're a native) Rivers in the hill country.

Good luck with the list.

[JRM]

These are great and do-able. I've lived in 5 different states in the past 12 years (my choice). I highly recommend moving.

What about Seattle? St. Louis? Nashville? as places to move.

[Miss Grace]

Mine's not as fleshed out as yours I fear.

http://www.missdisgrace.com/2008/12/life-list.html

[Nicole]

Moving to Portland, OR is number one on my list! Its my most favorite city ever and yet I have not lived there yet (I've got 3 other cities in Oregon under my belt, but still Portland calls to me). I am determined to leave Memphis, TN for Portland.

[Laura]

If you come to Ventura, CA, I'll treat you to a whale-watching trip!

[Jackie]

What a great idea! I'm feeling inspired by you, just like Maggie inspired you.

[Lisa]

My list: #1 find the time to go to therepy and discuss why I can't manage to think far enough into the future to make a list.

[Lisa]

#2 Learn how to spell or at least use spell check.

[Jana]

Hey, if you settle in Austin, you may mark off 2 on your life list: resettling AND floating down a river on a tube. The Guadalupe and San Marcos Rivers are great for that!!

[spandrel studios]

This time last year a post of Maggie's inspired me to make my list - but I've been woefully inadequate in terms of achieving any of it as of yet.
http://spandrelstudios.blogspot.com/2008/04/100-things-i-want-to-do.html

[Pictou]

#25 is on my list of things NOT to do. When I go on vacation I can barely stand to have my husband along. I vant to be alooone!

[Karen]

As for #9, can I suggest Judson Center? We are in Royal Oak at 13 Mile and Greenfield. Check it out. judsoncenter.org. All of our big corporate sponsers (the no longer Big 3) are no longer able to give and we do amazing things for children.

[Jen]

If (strike that) WHEN you move to Portland you can knock off the river tubing (head on down to So. Oregon and raft your heart out on the Rogue River) and travel a couple of hours North and you can whale watch for Orcas in the San Juan Islands. FYI you can rent a cabin on the lake there too :-)

[Krissa]

I'm sure several people have mentioned this already but the tubing in Texas is stellar. I particularly like the San Marcos segment but it's a little longer and has less fun (safe!) rapids. My mom used to take me and my girlfriends toobing every summer when I was a young teen and I LOVED it.

[nelking]

Portland

We love creative types.

My client, trying to make it even better for those who love arts and culture

www.theartscan.org

[nona]

Portland. For sure.

Grew up in Royal Oak, college and some in Austin.

Trust me.

[Maggie]

Yay! YAY! This was so much fun to read. Also, six of these things can be accomplished with a visit to the Masons. Now I'm plotting.

[Boulder]

Have to agree with the New Braunfels suggestion for the tubing the river - my grandfather did it, my dad did it, and I did it during college. It is crazy blue/green, tree covered in areas (so you don't need to feel like you've roasted the whole way) of the way, and it is terrific fun. I did it around Labor Day, and it was perfect - cooler, but still warm enough to enjoy being wet, and not too crowded because many are back in "school mode."

[HouseofJules]

Here's a link to an article in today's NYTimes on the Tonga Room & SF efforts to save it...
http://tinyurl.com/cm77p8

[Jweb]

Ginnie springs(FL) is a great place to go tubing, but in Austin we don't have alligators in our tubing waters.
Move to Austin.
Two things get checked off. Easy.

[Emmy]

I vote for Austin, because I'd probably get to see you more. Also, I'm available to be the person you host a party for and wittingly toast... And, i vote for the chicken sandwiches you made for us when babysitting as the family dish. I know I have an abnormal love for food to remember it from that long ago but it was delish. miss you!

[LizP]

If you move to Portland then you can go whale watching every season by only driving an hour or two!

[Manic Mommy]

Creating a list is too energetic for me. You gotta do 100 of these things before you die? My list would be small:

Enjoy each day
Love my family
Be uncontrollably happy
Smile a lot

Maybe I'll come up with a few more, but like I said, takes a lot of energy, and now I need a nap! : )

[Nichole]

I made a list shortly after Maggie put up her first life list post. I've made very little progress on it, but here it is.

[Jess]

I really enjoy your blog -- I always check in to see what's doing back home. Royal Oak was never my home, but boy do I know suburban Detroit....

In any case, if you don't get to Austin or Portland before next fall, then try tubing out in Ludington. Much cheaper!! You can rent a spot at the state park there for the weekend, and then get your tubes, a cooler, and your bad selves down to the river and jump in. There is nothin' like floating down a lazy river with the sun on your face, your butt in the water and a bag of Doritos to hand. Don't forget, the cooler needs beer. Just wedge that sucker in a tube and away you go!

Glen Lake was also a beautiful place to rent a cabin -- the waters were crystal clear, canoeing and fishing were good, and as kids, we loved it. It's been a lot of years, but I don't think it would disppoint.

(and about the dog, man, I don't think there's a better time. So many animals left homeless due to the economy. Any of those dogs would adore your children! Go for it!)

[rachellake]

Your list looks awesome!

On the wedding album front - you can have your negatives scanned onto a cd and then I would recommend using Blurb or some such service to print a book with very little effort on your part.

[Joy]

You could knock out # 1, 3, 25 by coming to Austin. #1 We've got rivers for tubing within' a short drive. There's even one with a little waterfall you get to go over. (Little and not dangerous. You won't even spill your beer if your careful) #3 Um, Austin is just freakin' awesome! Our motto "Keep Austin Weird". #25 Lake Travis or Lake Austin. What more do I have to say about that?

Let me know if you ever head this way. I can show you around and let you know where the best margaritas and Tex Mex food (minus the onions) can be found.

[ella]

Regarding #1 and #3 - if you move to Austin you could go tubing.

New Braunfels, Texas about an hour south of Austin has the Comal River. Beautiful and great for families.

[ella]

and in response to the hot Texas summers and schools...

EVERYTHING is air conditioned.

Yes, football is king but so are academics.
Best school districts are Eanes and Lake Travis. Check them out.

[alissa]

You know, the last time I was at Disney I was in 8th grade, it was a family, all inclusive trip and honestly? Still one of my favorite family trips ever, even in 8th grade! So you have some time with Maddie I think :)

[Sarah @ BecomingSarah.com]

I don't really have a list, but I do empathize with Number 8.

[darcy]

I was inspired by Maggie, but I aimed slightly lower...
I did a lay off list, things to accomplish this summer while searching for a job in the worse economy ever....
Mine features things like:
Ride a Mechanical Bull...

[T.]

Austin, Austin, Austin. No contest!

[Ian]

If you move to Portland, what will your husband do? The economy there has tanked, and there's no advertising industry to speak of. Austin--kids can go to UT for cheap, you can both probably get decent jobs, and while it's hot, A/C isn't all that expensive.

[Tracie]

We just did an all-inclusive trip to Disney World with our kids who are 19 and 16...and they can't wait to go back. Some people are never too old for the magic of Disney : )
Good list, though. I want to do the tubing thing, too. And I hate the phone as well.

[Heather B.]

This is great, Melissa.

[Traci]

Before you leave Michigan, go tubing on the Au Sable, out of Mio. Beautiful and fun, although maybe go on a weekday if possible, with the kids. Weekend days are a floating binge drinking party.

[Jules]

AC is awesome, but sometimes it's nice to be outside without sweating your balls off. The heat is so oppressive even the most hardcore Austinites debate moving come August. Eanes and Lake Travis? Great schools is you have tons of cash. Plus living in these areas kind of defeats the purpose of moving to Austin. It's a great town, don't get me wrong. It's just a good idea to keep in mind it's small, with few cultural opportunites and not much selection when it comes to fine dining/shopping.

[Amy]

I'm taking a stab in the dark here, but maybe one way to cross number eleven off your list would be to become a CASA volunteer. I just signed up; training starts this week (I'm in Ohio though, no idea what your county's schedule might be). Worth looking into/thinking about. http://www.nationalcasa.org/

[Lesley]

I will float down the river with you. I have lived on the St. Clair River my entire life and never done it. Email me ldurik at comcast dot net