Fake It Till You Make It.

Okay so most of us are in agreement, entertaining kids for 12 weeks straight is kind of a drag and some of us really love all those weeks and want more and then others of us would like you to know that you shouldn't have even HAD CHILDREN AT ALL if you weren't going to love every second of summer break.

Let me tell you this. I didn't know I wouldn't like summer break when I had them. I swear! If I'd known I would have ripped my ovaries out and worn them around my neck to drive potential mates away. But here I am, on summer break, and you know the kids realize this isn't my favorite time of year. They know I feel guilty about working when they're bored.

So, let's just make the best of this. You either cheer on my efforts and commiserate or (quietly) judge me (when you're not busy soaking up all the summer fun). Wooo!

The kids are hardly in purgatory over here. They've played with friends, gone to a Tigers game, spent the day at the beach and gone to a movie. And we're just 6 days in.

Imagine what can happen for the next 2.3 months! We'll probably be having tea parties and craft fairs by the end of the summer!

On Friday night we went to the Tigers game with a bunch of other families.

Between all of us we have 14 kids, not quite the Duggars but still a spectacular sight in my kitchen.

The weather report called for rain pretty much every hour with a varying 'chance of' percent of between 50% and "My Goodness You Are Screwed"-% and sure enough about an hour or two into the game the sprinkles turned to full blown rain and then lightening and thunder. The stands cleared out pretty quickly and our enormous group met in the hall.

We decided to make our way out of the stadium, with about 1 billion other people. From where I walked through the insane crowd I could see Logan, Max and Maddie, my friend's son Daniel and my friend Leslie and her little girl. Logan had my friend's four year old on his shoulders. I kept count of my two kids and my other friends son.

A few times Daniel looked back, wondering where his mom and dad were, but being pushed along in the crowd there was no way to find them without possibly getting lost. So I told him to keep walking with us and once we were out of the stadium we'd find his parents.

As we made it out of the stadium into the street, I had this sudden feeling of comfort, knowing that I have the kinds of friends who trust us to keep their kids safe. Even if I didn't have my own kids in sight, I'd know my friends have them and are bringing them up behind us.

Parenting as a village task is something amazing.

Comments

[carrie]

I have a "no child left behind" policy. This means I take kids home from places, like the mall or wherever we happen to be, because I can't stand the thought of my own kids being left alone to wait for a ride or whatever. My kids know this, their friends know this, and so I end up transporting a lot. Do people take advantage of my policy? Possibly, but I do it anyway. Because I would want other parents to do it for my kids.

[Lisa]

We have the same thing with our friends and it's a wonderful feeling. Really comes in handy when we go camping with 8 families (12 adults & 14 kids age 13 years-11 mos), otherwise it'd probably be the most stressful week of our lives.

[Anyabeth]

Oh those poor babies! How horrifying to be supplied with summer fun! SHOCKING

I cannot believe that people are judging you on not loving having to entertain two children every SECOND of summer break. Wait, I can believe it, this is the internet.

[tonya]

When I was a kid, I was turned out of the house and told to be back at lunch and supper. Other than that, we were on our own.

I don't think you should be expected to entertain your children every moment. That's why God gave them imaginations! ;-)

[getsheila]

Yes, really, what were you thinking even having children at all? If you cannot maintain joy and happiness at all times while they nag and complain and morph into small trolls while pushing all your buttons, what kind of mother are you?

And should you ever get cancer or some other horrible disease some day, whatever you do BE POSITIVE. It isn't nice to make other people sad and uncomfortable just because you are going to die.

And if some asshole bitches to you in your blog comments, you really shouldn't take offense. I mean, it's not like it's your own personal space or anything.

Oh wait...

[Karin]

Getsheila, not everyone dies from cancer - some fight like hell to stay alive and are doing quite well with that. Like me, for instance!

Just reading that sentence struck a chord - sorry for the change of topic Melissa.

Cancer is a word...not a sentence!

[Accidental Olympian]

See, I think you're a fighter for playing entertainer all summer. When I was a kid my mom REFUSED to deal with in the summer so we were always enrolled in camp. And you best believe the minute we were old enough to work we found jobs.

Summer vacation. What's that?

[bethh]

Good luck staying sane - I don't think I could do it, and there's no shame about it!

[Sue]

I now have a grandchild. Who lives with me. Who is 16 months old. Who will also be on summer vacation when he's not with me 24/7. So I guess I'll take summer vacation when it comes.

[getsheila]

Karin: It's called humor. My mom is a cancer survivor. Two aunts, one grandmother, two cousins, and one close friend were not so lucky. I reserve the right to joke about cancer any way I want to. No offense.

[MelissaS]

Oh boy Cancer is really all up in my grill this week!!!!

[Lisa V]

We have a pool, a trampoline, a creek, 1/2 acre yard, basketball hoop, bikes, scooters and inside toys up the wazoo. Yet, my children will still complain that they are bored.

I'm their mom, not their cruise director. But yes, I feel guilty when they want to do x, y or z and either I have to work, we can't afford it, or I just don't want to do it.

[paiget]

I had my 8 y/o make a list of things he likes to do so he could refer to it when he was bored. Make mom crazy came in at #9. Right after board games, but before play outside.

[Andrea]

Forgive me if this has been suggested before, but what about letting them get bored? Boredom is the gateway to creativity in my experience - if you leave them to their own devices (and wear earplugs) they will figure out what to do and it will be something you never imagined suggesting. I assume they have an arsenal of Legos, water guns, sidewalk chalk, books etc. to draw from. You shouldn't feel like you have to be Activities Director all the time. Bookmark some websites for them (crayola physics, Canon paper crafts, etc.) enroll them in the library's summer reading program and otherwise give them some tools, but beyond that I say let them figure out on their own what to do. Maybe warn them that complaints about being bored will result in chores to keep them busy - it may take some time for them to get out of the habit of expecting you to entertain them.

[kris]

when did it become a parents job to entertain their kids all the freaked time? i know i hate hearing the 'i'm bored' and play with me shit all the time. my parents never played with me and entertained me when i was a kid. let them entertain themselves. of course if they are not allowed to go anywhere or do anything without you than i guess it is on you. we ran around like little wild animals back in the day. not so many kids can do that now.

[Jess]

Okay, this is getting boring. You're a good mom and F anyone who judges you. You make us normal moms feel like slackers. Crafts and ball games and whatever else. You speak from the heart and I'm sick of you trying to defend yourself. This is your site and they are taking it over, WTF? P.S. you're sooo pretty, I don't even get how anyone could bash your looks.

[MelissaS]

Jess, I'm not trying to defend myself. I'm speaking from my heart.

PS I didn't even know anyone was bashing my looks. What I don't know can't hurt me. Hush, now. Hush.

[lynne]

Ok I'm hesitant to get in on this, but can I just say to Accidental Olympian that camp is not necessarily a way to refuse to deal with summer - my daughter is in camp all summer long because my husband and I are at work all day. We save all year to be able to send her to camp and it is worth every penny. She is swimming, hiking, building forts, checking out snakes and turtles, making best friends, and having a fabulous summer that I would never have the resources or sanity to be able to provide for her if I was home all day with her. I think she's a pretty lucky kid. Still, she comes home and is instantly bored, and I have to set the timer and say "ok, go play with a toy for 15 minutes, go!" So I still feel your pain Melissa. And you are a beautiful, terrific mom who inspires us all. A baseball game with 14 kids, are you kidding me? Mother of the year, right there. And I'm glad you have a circle of good friends to support you. Ok getting out of the fray now.

[Amy]

Check out Stephanie Nielson's blog archives to anytime prior to her plane crash in August 2008, She's got great ideas (she does now also, but she's limited because her injuries are so extreme.) http://nieniedialogues.blogspot.com/